Avsnitt
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They're all over social media; Funny memes with parents mocking modern parenting - showing the ridiculous ways that we as parents have become subservient to our children and scared to put a foot wrong.
It's funny. And sadly true.
In this episode I ask the question:
How have we gotten here?
And I offer my perspective on what many of us have misunderstood in the pursuit of giving our children a sense that they matter, that their feelings are valid and that they're unconditionally loved.
Feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all?
No wonder. Parenting is hard! Just as you thought you'd nailed it - a new thing comes up;
Your child wants a phone
Your tween starts becoming more sassy
Your toddler won't sleep on their own
Rather than searching on the internet for tips and tricks to deal with your unique family - know that I am here to support you.
Parenting support - tailored to your family - in a way that suits you best;
Zoom
In person
Walk and Talk
If you would like to book a free parenting consultation to find out how parent coaching can transform your family life - get in touch by sending me an email:
[email protected]
Want free tips and additional resources?
I have written countless blogs and articles on anything you can think of as a parent. I share these in my weekly newsletters - including information about exciting offers and online and inperson events.
Make sure you don't miss any of this and sign up here:
https://louise-brooks.com/
Want to make a difference to a young person this Christmas?
Join our 10 mile charity walk in support of Children in CHAMS in-patient units this December.
When: Sunday Decebmer 8th (9am)
Where: Meet at the gates of Windsor Castle where we will embark on a scenic walk through Great Windsor Park, Viriginia Water Lake, Sunningdale - before reaching the charming village, Chobham - where we celebrate at the White Hart pub.
This walk is for families and anyone up for a little challenge. You can bring your dog, a pushchair and kids - or you can simply donate to this worthy cause.
Read more about the charity and register right here:To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
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Of course threats work. In the here and now - if we are willing to threaten to take something away that our child really cares about.
But do threats as a way to foster cooperation give us what we want for our children and ourselves in the long run?
In this episode I propose that we put guilt, shame and our own inner critic to one side - and simply get curious about the long (and short ) term effect of threats in our parenting.
This episode might be just what you need to share with your partner or for you to see things in a new light.
In the episode I refer to the 2nd episode of this podcast:
"Three things that fuel cooperation" - which would follow on nicely from today's episode.
You can catch that right here:
https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/2-three-things-that-fuel-cooperation/id1657607176?i=1000590867085
WALKING HOME FOR CHRISTMAS:
Join me and other families when we embark on a 10mile long walk in support of CAHMS children and adolescents in inpatient treatment over the festive season.
You can make a real diffference to these young people during a difficult time of year for them.
When:
Sunday 8th of December
9am
Where:
We set off from Windsor Castle gate and finish at Chobham's White Hart pub.
Who can come:
ANYONE who would like to walk, connect and enjoy this beautifully scenic route.
You can donate and register for the walk right here;
https://www.justgiving.com/page/louise-brooks-1728987523914?utm_medium=fundraising&utm_content=page%2Flouise-brooks-1728987523914&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=pfp-shareTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
Facebook:
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Saknas det avsnitt?
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The afternoons with children can feel like a dreaded part of the day. The time of day when the tank is emptying, but the kids' needs and emotions are most pressing.
Kids fall out in the car
The snacks you bring are not the right ones
The mode of transport is not what your child had wanted
Why are afternoons so difficult?
In this short episode, I offer a different way of viewing this part of the day and structuring it in ways that serve both you and your child.To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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She can ride a horse.
She can get herself dressed, make breakfast, cycle to the shops and take the bus.
Why can't she just tidy up all the clothes in her her own room???!!!
Have you ever wondered why you're locked into conflict about the same scenarios in your family?
If so, this episode is for you.
Pulling from the work of Byron Katie, I show you how her 5 mind opening questions helped me to view my recurring battle with my daughter - and what you need to know about independence before you double down on getting your child to do what you see their same aged friend doing - all by themselves.
Byron Katie's books, work sheets and work can be found here;
https://thework.com/To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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All people pleasers were once parent pleasers.
People pleasing is something we all do to some extent.
Why?
Or else no one would want to be around us. The constant balance we are all faced with having to strike, is when to cooperate with others and do what the world wants of us - and when to honor our own limits, wants and desires.
As Jung famously said;
"The first half of a human's life is spent living in accordance with what others want from us. The second half of a human's life is spent honoring what we want for ourself"
It can be difficult to watch our child trying to fit in, pleasing friends who aren't worthy of their attention and doing things that are not in line with their moral compass, in order to be liked.
DON'T DO IT! We feel like saying. But when we do - we don't get through.
Because kids don't do what we say - they ultimately come to do as we do.
This episode delves into the two conflicting needs we all have;
For connection - and for authenticity.
How do we get our child to cooperate in ways that doesn't squash their authenticity?
How do we work on our own stuff while helping our kids become grounded in themselves?
How do we raise kids who respect themselves enough to not self-abandon in order to meet their own needs for love and connection?
Have a listen on your next walk or drive - and share with a friend you know would like to hear these wordsTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Trauma has become part of mainstream language. Trauma is no longer understood as what brings us into A&E -but what occurs as a result of childhood experiences growing up.
But how do we make sense of trauma when it comes to our parenting? How can we help our child cope with difficult circumstances? You might have sometimes wondered:
Have we traumatised our child?
In my work with parents I often get asked if:
- The aggressive sleep method they applied when their child was a baby
- The arguments and loud conflicts they have with their partner
- Their own illness or mental health challenges
- The loss of a beloved family member
is going to traumatise their child.
I think we've all asked ourselves that question from time to time.
And in this episode I speak about the counter intuitive parenting tip that can make all the difference for you and your child.To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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We all know that children lie sometimes.
But - when our OWN child lies - it can feel hard not to get triggered.
"I told them I want the truth"
"I'm raising a liar"
"Why is my child so deceitful?"
In this episode I share 3 perspectives about lying - that can help you hopefully stay a little more grounded when you respond to your child. And actionable strategies to help your child to tell the truth.
You might want to share this one with a friend or your partnerTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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There is that fine line that we can cross as parents when what our child does or says provokes us. It is that line that line that denotes that we are dealing with and talking to our child - and not another adult.
We modify our language
We dial down the volume
We engage in less threatening body language.
After all, we are talking to a child, right!?
But most parents will recognise that once the surge of cortisol and adrenalin rushes through the blood and gears you up for fight or flight, it can feel hard to think straight. To get the thinking brain back online again.
In this primal state - we can come off as scary to our children.
And it is in those, less rosy parenting moments, that our own inner critic has a field day;
"I am not a good parent"
"No one else would behave like that"
"I need so much therapy"
These are human moments that most parents will encounter - but that few will talk about. And maybe, it feels like there's no alternative to the immediate reaction.
No stop button to push once the train has left the station.
Oscar Van Rooij and I are exploring what happens in these difficult parenting moments, and what we can do to begin to regulate ourselves and recognise the signs that we are heading into the red zone.
This might be just what you needed to hearTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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The thing that we most yearn for is to feel connected and that we matter to each other.
how we can have relationship conversations without saying; "we need to talk" how we might be able to tell that we are feeling disconnected in our relationship and how this affects the whole familywhat we can do to create more connection and why our relationship dissatisfaction doesn't change by wanting our partner to do more.
But why is then, that we often prioritise the laundry, packing the bag for the next day and emptying the dishwasher over spending time with our partner?
And what is the cost of living this way?
I asked someone who really knows about the importance of relationships. Catherine Topham Sly - BACP accredited couples relationship therapist and transformation coach is worth a follow on social media where she shares her wisdom in little nuggets that make you feel seen, heard and empowered to tackle the ups and downs of our relationship.
We explored:
You can access Catherine's work here:
https://insightconnection.uk/
https://www.instagram.com/insightandconnection/
And retrieve her free downloadable question prompts to boost connection:
https://subscribepage.com/openendedquestionsTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
Facebook:
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All too often, the children's school break is anything but a break for us parents.
It feels more like an addition of work and chores -or more of everything; conflict, connection, tears and joy.
Intense togetherness with our family highlights one thing; our ability to have our own needs met when we're surrounded by little people and partner's with needs too.
Experienced health coach, Sarah Stannard is my guest in this episode and she shares her top tips for getting us mentally and physically ready for week ahead.
Sarah is a big believer in preparation and scheduling.
And it makes perfect sense - because how often do we find ourselves with a spare hour to spend on ourselves - unless we put our own needs on the family's agenda too.
Sarah Stannard's private practice is based in Chertsey, Surrey.
She delivers regular corporate wellness events, and consult for both Surrey County Council on their “be your best” program for children in Surrey and Healthier Weight UK and The Weight Loss Clinic. On a monthly basis.
She also produces health and wellness articles for numerous publications and her work has been featured in The Global Women Magazine, Women’s Own and on BBC Radio Surrey/Sussex.
You can get in touch with Sarah for private sessions or if you'd like to get her free hormone balancing information packet right here:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarah-stannard-77018b22/
www.sarahstannard.com
or email her on:
[email protected]|
To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Can you actually change your mind without loosing your child's respect?
When your child has asked you for a snack and you've said no - but you realise that your child might be more hungry than you thought or you just don't have it in you that day to tow the line
or
When you cancelled the birthday party your child was looking forward to going to - in a fit of frustration
Can you actually change your mind without being seen as permissive?
Many of us WANT to - but feel bad about doing so.
Consistency is key after all.
I'm here to tell you - you can!
But HOW you do so matters greatly.
In this episode I walk you through the do's and don'ts - and a powerful question to ask yourself before you change your no to a yes.To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Have you ever felt that everyone else's feelings and needs take precedence over your own?
That you are so quick to tune into the needs of those around you, that you figure you'll come back to you when you have enough time.. only that time never comes?
That's called parenting.
But it need not be this way. Because it benefits no one.
It is when we start our day on the backfoot in this way, that a morning tantrum, lateness or a forgotten bag throws us and sees us reacting in ways that we spend hours forgiving ourselves for once we've parted ways with our family.
In this episode I'm sharing with you my most powerful morning ritual - one that you can refer to anytime of day - but is particularly useful to practice before you lean into your day.
It takes less than 10 minutes but you reap the benefits throughout the day.
This episode is one you might want to save and come back to time and time againTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Few things can feel more upsetting than to part ways with our child at the school/ nursery gate, following a morning of chaos, tears and tantrums.
How do we get children to cooperate with us in the morning without the use of threats, yelling and defiance?
My wonderful guest in this episode is Angeliki, mum of 2 and a mum I have had the pleasure of working with over the past 3 years.
Angeliki's biggest frustration at the moment, is instilling independence in her 8 year old daughter - who currently only gets herself ready in the morning if her parents physically dress her.
Angeliki wonders if there is an alternative that she hasn't yet discovered?
Whether independence will ever be achieved if they add as much help as she seems to need right now?
This conversation is for you if you recognise some of these thoughts and you can be sure you to walk away much clearer on what fosters cooperation and what promotes independence in children.To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Nothing like a little sprinkle of doomsday picture to motivate our child, right?!
In this episode we dive into 5 common ways that we drain our own energy as parents and inspire fear, limiting beliefs and insecurity in our children.
We also look at our obsessive focus on the British weather and using our child's difficult moment as a teachable situation - rarely feels effective.
Finish the year a little clearer on what you might unintentionally pass on - so that you can show up more intentional.
I can't wait to connect with you again in 2024
Thank you so much for listeningTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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And on
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What is it actually like to be a teen?
What it FELT like being that ageHow their change in mood, hormones and interests impacted on their relationships to their parentsWhat they felt about their parents boundaries What they wish their parents had trusted about themWhat parents can do to stay connected during the tween/ teen phase.
Of course we can ask ourselves what it felt like.
But then again - it's a while ago AND we didn't live in the age of social media, mobile phones and a global pandemic.
I have had the privilege of sitting down with three young women, - 19, 20 and 22 - to explore
This is SUCH a brilliant listen because these three girls are so good at reflecting and communicating their experiences.
If you are a parent in this season of life - this one is for youTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
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Adolescence doesn't have a good rep.
need for privacyrude and sassy attitudeembarrassment laziness
When your children approach this age, well-meaning parents who've been through this period themselves, will 'wish you luck' - and your parents might have jokingly prophesied that your karmic lesson will be taught during this time.
Rather than softening our critical gaze, and embracing the word 'grace' these ways of talking about raising teens and tweens - make us want to amour up - ready for battle.
Oscar van Rooij is back, this time talking about a topic that is close to home for the both of us. The gear that we are having to change in our parenting, when raising tweens and teens.
We talk about:
And.. perhaps most importantly - what we can do to support our children AND our own future - during this time.To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
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As if parenting wasn't hard enough.
The way we show up in relation to our partner and the role we inhabit in our family's dynamic - can be really tricky.
Oscar Van Rooij is back - and we are exploring how the feminine and masculine energy that exists inside all of us, often take on new forms when we become parents and the to-do lists pile up and the mental load increases.
This episode is for all mums and dads who sometimes feel stuck in roles that they didn't feel they signed up for in the family, and who wish to understand better the differences between the male and female mind.
Oscar Van Rooij is a Dutch motivational speaker and coach, residing in the UK. Oscar runs online courses, offers free master classes and shares his brilliant work through 1:1 sessions online.
You can get in touch with him here:
https://oscarvanrooij.com/
SHOW NOTES:
The YouTube clip referred to in this episode can be found here:
https://youtu.be/29JPnJSmDs0?si=GO-SAT5n1r_N2hFNTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
Facebook:
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What does it mean to be a good parent?
In most other areas of life we are able to rate our progress, score ourselves and determine whether we are good, below average or whether we are acing it.
And then there's parenting.
If we look at our children's behaviours to tell us whether we're good parents - we're most likely going to get a different score every day.
No - we need to often look at other things that BEHAVIOUR.
I share, in this episode, 3 things that might surprise you - that reassure me as a mum and maybe after listening to this, you feel a little better about yourself as a parent.To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Before I became a parent I looked at other parents and thought;
CookingPlanningOrganising
Parenting is all about getting good at the practical stuff;And of course, setting boundaries so that the children can be tolerable for other people.
Some of us become so well versed at the practical sides of parenting, never missing an appointment, never sending our children out into the world with dirty hands, unkempt hair or creased clothes - that we overlook - possibly THE most important parenting skill of all.
In this episode I share what I see as the most important parenting quality - and ways that we can begin to grow that muscle WHILE taking care of the million practical things that relate to being a mum or dad.
To learn more about the wonderful
WALK AND TALK - parenting program - please visit:
www.louise-brooks.com
or contact me on;
[email protected] to book your free 20 minute discovery callTo get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
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https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
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Why do we feel so hard done by when our children don't comply or when our partner fails to meet our needs?
The reason we feel life or other people are against usWhat meeting our own needs has to do with our ability to feel differentlyHow we can become more okay with 'what is' - even if it is not what we prefer.
In this episode, Oscar van Rooij shares:Oscar van Rooij is a passionate coach, speaker and facilitator and committed to sharing the brilliant work of Tony Robbins. Oscar is Dutch, a dad of 2 and lives in the UK where he coaches in person and remotely. And if you'd like to get in touch with him, you can find him on:
www.oscarvanrooij.com
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/oscarvanrooy/To get weekly tips and parenting inspiration sent straight to your inbox - head over to
www.louise-brooks.com to sign up for my weekly newsletter
You can follow me on
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/parentingsuccesscoaching/
And on
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/ - Visa fler
