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Alright, let’s talk about self-esteem.
Have you ever felt like you're just one awkward social interaction away from a full-blown identity crisis? Like, one unanswered text, one awkward pause in a conversation, or one unliked Instagram post, and suddenly you're spiraling into, "Does anyone even like me?”
Well, welcome to the club—it's a big one.
In this episode, I’m talking about self-esteem: what it really is, why so many of us struggle with it, and how it connects to our relationship with food and body image. Because let’s be honest, it's not about staring at yourself in the mirror and repeating affirmations until you magically feel worthy.
Tweetable Quotes"We all, every single person, need to be seen, heard, accepted, and supported." - Rachelle Heinemann
"In order to heal from an eating disorder and in order to develop some version of a healthy self-esteem, it's all the same idea—the acceptance that I am who I am." - Rachelle Heinemann
"I take up space. I do have lots of flaws. Not everyone's going to like me, but I have to take up space." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Self-esteem is about knowing the people who matter to you already, accept you and you know you're good enough the way you are without changing." - Rachelle Heinemann
ResourcesWe're hiring! If you think you could be a great fit, email your resume & cover letter to w.rachelleheinemann.com
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Have you ever felt that tiny bit of excitement about breaking a “food rule?” Like finally getting your hands on the “forbidden” chocolate cake, only to inhale half of it and immediately promise yourself you’ll “be good” tomorrow? Yeah, we’ve all been there. But what if that intense food drama could just… disappear? No guilt, no shame, no last-supper mentality—just food, doing what food is supposed to do: nourish and satisfy.
So, if you’ve ever felt trapped in food rules, if “cheat days” have ever dictated your weekend plans, or if you’re just curious what the next step in healing your relationship with food looks like—this episode is for you.
Elyse Resch, MS, RDN, CEDS-C, Fiaedp, FADA, FAND, is a nutrition therapist in private practice with forty-three years of experience, specializing in eating disorders, Intuitive Eating, and Health at Every Size. She is the co-author of Intuitive Eating, now in its 4th edition, the Intuitive Eating Workbook and The Intuitive Eating Card Deck—50 Bite-Sized Ways to Make Peace with Food.
Tweetable Quotes"Maybe for the beginning, you might eat more of something that you have previously restricted, but it takes its place because it's no longer forbidden." - Elyse Resch
"It's not like we're ruining the enjoyment of food, it's just that we don't have that charge anymore of, ‘I'm going to get my hands on this and I'm going to be so good tomorrow, I'll just eat it all right now.’" - Elyse Resch
"It's all about healing. I never talk about recovery. I talk about the healing process." - Elyse Resch
"So every one of us who makes a change in that kind of thinking [ weight stigmatization] is actually bettering the world." - Elyse Resch
"Children are listening. Be careful." - Elyse Resch
ResourcesVisit Elyse’s Website Here!
Learn More About Intuitive Eating
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Saknas det avsnitt?
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Many often question whether they’re “sick enough” or feel like their struggles don’t fit into a neat little box. So let’s talk about it.
This week, we’re diving into why eating disorders are way more complex than the labels we slap on them—and why real recovery requires thinking outside the diagnosis.
Tweetable Quotes"It is impossible to focus on just symptom reduction and not the bigger picture of all the other things that contribute to someone's eating disorder." - Rachelle Heinemann
"The second someone's relationship with food or really anything out there bothers them, it's already an issue." - Rachelle Heinemann
"When we typically see one version of an infection in a hospital, we can sort of treat it the same way—but with mental health, it's not uniform at all." - Rachelle Heinemann
"You couldn't possibly treat someone based on a diagnosis because then you've missed most of the story." - Rachelle Heinemann
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In this episode, we’re diving headfirst into practical tools to deal with dissociation —the kind of techniques that are handy to have when you feel like your brain and body feel like they’re speaking two different languages.
Tweetable Quotes"Dissociation is just sort of like what it sounds like: dissociated from whatever's going on." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Our bodies hold everything in that is important." - Rachelle Heinemann
"There has to be some wiggle room to be able to open yourselves up and try something new." - Rachelle Heinemann
"If you eye roll too much, or if you use sarcasm through all of this, then you completely cut off yourself from your internal somatic experience." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Your body will often have the answers way before your brain does." - Rachelle Heinemann
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The media often portrays eating disorders as affecting ultra-thin, hospital-bed-bound college girls. While this happens, it’s not the majority of what we mean when we say someone struggles with an “eating disorder.”
In this episode, I’m talking about how the media’s (and beyond) portrayal is not only wildly inaccurate but also dangerously misleading. That “sick enough” myth? It’s real. And let’s be honest, it’s all kinds of messed up. I’m unraveling the reason why those 19-year-old, emaciated models aren’t the majority, and how most people don’t fit neatly into a category.
Tweetable Quotes"Eating disorders are when food and emotions are kind of messed up."- Rachelle Heinemann
"The emotions are the crux of it. They're the absolute foundation of it. And if we neglect to look at the emotions part of it, then we are neglecting basically the entirety of the eating disorder." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Just because somebody doesn't have any medical complications at all doesn't mean they don't have an eating disorder." - Rachelle Heinemann
"The largest percentage of people that we see with eating disorders... is the category for the people who don't fit in the categories." - Rachelle Heinemann
"It's important to talk about what eating disorders actually are: a complicated relationship with food, and we have this continuum of where the symptoms lie." - Rachelle Heinemann
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Picture this: you’re 18, your body is one way. Then you blink, and suddenly you’re navigating a new shape, new rules, and oh, a closet that betrays you every step of the way. What gives?
Hormones give, my friend. And they’re running the show.
Today’s episode is the reality check you might be looking for.
In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Esther Rollhous, She’s a reproductive psychiatrist who’s here to unpack the hormonal chaos—er, beautiful journey—we all endure. From the sneaky effects of estrogen on your brain to the “Oh, my hips just widened forever” postpartum revelation, she’s breaking it all down. Dr. Rollhous is bringing both science and empathy to help us reset those expectations and maybe—just maybe—make peace with our ever-evolving forms.
Tweetable Quotes"Your body is different. It will probably be bigger, maybe a different shape completely. And that is expected." - Rachelle Heinemann
"To expect to have the same or similar body to what we had when we were 18 or 19 years old is absolutely bonkers." - Rachelle Heinemann
"The reproductive system is not essential to survival. When the body is in a calorie deficit, it's going to prioritize living over reproducing." - Dr. Esther Rollhaus
"Pregnancy literally remodels your brain, with some changes lasting up to two years postpartum." - Dr. Esther Rollhaus
"Snapback is a really toxic expectation to have of women, not acknowledging the tremendous change their bodies and identities have undergone." - Dr. Esther Rollhaus
"Moms want to do everything they can for the baby, but sometimes this leads to disordered eating." - Dr. Esther Rollhaus
"The healthier the mom is, the healthier the baby and the pregnancy will be." - Dr. Esther Rollhaus
ResourcesDr. Esther Rollhaus’ website: https://www.childandfamilypsychiatry.com/
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Welcome to 2025, where we’re leaving behind unrealistic New Year’s resolutions and that tired idea that confidence is about power poses and pretending to have your life together - cause it’s not.
We’re throwing out the idea that confidence is some sort of performance art and instead diving into the real deal: confidence as resilience.
Tweetable Quotes"Confidence itself is not showy. It is feeling secure." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Resilience and confidence cannot be born.” - Rachelle Heinemann
"If you don't embody this courageous version of yourself, if you don't do things, especially before you're ready, you won't go anywhere." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Instead of saying, 'I'm going to power through this particular piece,' even though it seems challenging, think about it and think about, 'What is holding me back here? What am I afraid of?'” - Rachelle Heinemann
"Maybe building resilience and building mastery means starting from the ABCs." - Rachelle Heinemann
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In this episode, I’m diving into what actually builds confidence: relationships. Real ones. Consistent, validating, non-judgy, "I-got-you" type of relationship. The kind that reminds you you’re worthy, even when you’re sporting your least flattering sweatpants.
Confidence isn’t flashy or loud. Sometimes, the most confident person in the room is the quiet one. (Let that one marinate.)
Tweetable Quotes"Confidence is complex, and it is impossible to give a list of things to do in order to build confidence." - Rachelle Heinemann
"It takes a lot of risk and a lot of emotional vulnerability to build confidence." - Rachelle Heinemann
"The confident people in the room might actually be the quietest people in the room." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Building confidence is not making a person narcissistic or outwardly charismatic." - Rachelle Heinemann
"The idea of building confidence ultimately stems from your capacity [or your privilege] of being in a relationship with people who consistently provide you with reassurance, validation, soothing, and support." - Rachelle Heinemann
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You know that feeling when a conversation veers off the rails, but you can’t look away because the train wreck is oddly fascinating? Yeah, we’re about to do that—but in a way that will make you think, “Wait, why aren’t more people talking about this?”
In this episode, I’m joined by Jenna Hollenstein. Together, we’re talking about what’s happening in the field, how we navigate division, and what it looks like to move from conflict to connection.
Spoiler alert: it’s not glamorous, but it’s worth it.
Jenna Hollenstein, MS, RDN, CDN, is an anti-diet dietitian-nutritionist, certified Intuitive Eating Counselor, speaker, meditation teacher, and author of five books, including Eat to Love and Intuitive Eating for Life.
Tweetable Quotes"What I'm missing and what I'm really hungry for are public examples of repair, public examples of somehow continuing the conversation." - Jenna Hollenstein
"Boring has got such a bad rap, right? Because boring is not just boring. Boring is also repetitive enough that you notice the subtle variations from day to day." - Jenna Hollenstein
"Something that I realized meditation had done for me was that it increased my appetite for reality as opposed to fantasy." - Jenna Hollenstein
"In our efforts to be inclusive, we’ve been so exclusive about it." - Rachelle Heinemann
"My fear is that when we're secretly hoping that we never publicly screw up, we actually stop doing any of the useful stuff we can really do to learn." - Jenna Hollenstein
"What helps us feel safe is the feeling that we are safe through our connection with others." - Jenna Hollenstein
ResourcesVisit Jenna’s Website Here!
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What happens when “just eat” isn’t the solution, and the stakes are literally life or death?
Picture this: you’re at the dinner table. Your teenager is glaring at you like you’ve personally served up their worst nightmare—maybe broccoli, maybe a slice of pizza, who knows? They shout, “You’re ruining my life!” Meanwhile, you’re just trying to figure out if this counts as “parenting” or if you’re starring in some twisted reality show.
In this episode, I’m joined by Susannah Neufeld—a licensed psychotherapist, certified eating disorder specialist and consultant, author, and all-around badass about how FBT turns the chaos of food fights into moments of healing. Spoiler alert: it’s as heartwarming as it is messy.
Tweetable Quotes"You know your kid the best, and I know a lot about eating disorders, and we're going to work together to figure this out." - Suzannah Neufeld
"When your kid yells at you, you're getting a gift because you're getting to see what's happening inside their head... if you can respond to it with strength and love, they're going to internalize that." - Suzannah Neufeld
"FBT really supports the idea that the kid is not alone in it. They're part of a team working on this." - Suzannah Neufeld
"The kid is not the one who's lying. The kid is not the one who might hide the food. That's the illness. That's the eating disorder that's doing that." - Suzannah Neufeld
"I’m not going to be the person who saves you or your family. You’re saving your own life, and I’m on the journey with you." - Rachelle Heinemann
ResourcesA network that supports the Bay Area ED Care Community
Suzannah’s book - Awake at 3 a.m.: Yoga Therapy for Anxiety and Depression in Pregnancy and Early Motherhood (Parallax Press, 2018).
Suzannah is a contributing author in the anthology, Yoga Rising: 30 Empowering Stories from Yoga Renegades for Every Body.
Suzannah Neufeld's Website
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Body image is one of the most overused but essential topics in mental health.
So why does poor body image seem to be the last clingy guest at the recovery party, the one who refuses to take a hint and just leave? Sure, changing your body might give you a short-term confidence boost, but once that “ideal” inevitably slips away, so does that fragile confidence. Turns out, there’s no quick fix here. Instead, there’s a long road to unpacking why we’ve all bought into the lie that self-worth and body size go hand in hand.
Tweetable Quotes“I know that you might feel more confident when you shrink your body and then you feel like you have a better body image, but that confidence is very much tied to your body.” - Rachelle Heinemann
"Body image is really not at all like a symptom." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Who said that working on our body image is supposed to be easy?" - Rachelle Heinemann
"What would people think about you if you took up more space?" - Rachelle Heinemann
"If I want to feel more confident, I have to take a lot of risks with doing things that I don't want to do, whether it's interpersonally or just with tasks." - Rachelle Heinemann
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Body size does NOT equal health status.
Let’s be real: there’s a lot of confusion surrounding weight, health, and chronic illnesses like diabetes and PCOS. And if you’re like me, you’re probably tired of hearing the same old, tired advice. There are so many mixed messages when it comes to health and body size. Especially this myth that being in a larger body means you’re unhealthy.
Tweetable Quotes"There’s so many different things that you can do to manage chronic illness that have absolutely nothing to do with your body size." - Rachelle Heinemann
"You can't tell from looking at somebody if they're healthy or not." - Chelsea Levy
"Over 90 percent of the population will gain back weight that they intentionally lose." - Chelsea Levy
“Diet culture is always selling us to do more, eat less, go harder.” - Chelsea Levy
“We know that it’s unethical to prescribe weight loss and also we see a lot of doctors prescribing behaviors without actually asking what clients are doing.” - Chelsea Levy
ResourcesCheck out Chelsea Levy’s website here!
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Tweetable Quotes
"It's pretty rare to find a doctor who practices from a weight-inclusive perspective." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Obesity stigma is extremely common in healthcare settings. People with larger bodies like consistently in research study after research study say, that healthcare settings are some of the most stigmatizing places that they go." - Dr. Mara Gordon
“Even the American Medical Association has said that clinicians shouldn't be using BMI to really be making decisions about their individual patients.” - Dr. Mara Gordon
"My approach as a size-inclusive doctor is basically like I let the patient initiate that conversation." - Dr. Mara Gordon
"Food is so important. It's so cultural. It's a way that we share community, a way that we show respect to people, and it really can change the way that people sort of experience food." - Dr. Mara Gordon
ResourcesDr. Mara Gordon’s website
Dr. Mara Gordon’s substack
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If you’ve ever stood on the brink of a party, heart racing, contemplating whether to take the plunge into a sea of social awkwardness, you’re in good company. I mean, who doesn’t love the thrill of risking utter humiliation over finger foods and small talk, right? Spoiler alert: I don’t.
In this episode, I’m unpacking the intricacies of anxiety around social situations, recovery, and all those delightful emotions we tend to shove down deep. We'll explore the ever-elusive idea of "recovery"—which, let’s be honest, can feel like trying to define “normal.” Is it just me, or does it come with as many definitions as there are people trying to navigate it?
Tweetable Quotes"Recovery means something different to every person, and it's really great to try to describe it and break it down, what it means, and what it could look like." - Rachelle Heinemann
"If you're more vulnerable with somebody, you develop more trust, deeper trust." - Rachelle Heinemann
"We just sort of have to close our eyes and jump off the cliff to [a certain extent] with someone that lets us know that they might be a safe enough person to be vulnerable with." - Rachelle Heinemann
“You can't just build authentic connection by hanging out and not being vulnerable at all.” - Rachelle Heinemann
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Whether you are active on social media or not, it’s probably had an impact on your life in one way or another. Let’s be honest—most of us have a love-hate relationship with it, and it’s the same story when it comes to how it impacts our relationship with food and body image. But, hey, why delete Instagram when you can just add more stress to your life, right?
In this episode, I’m joined by Lily Thrope, a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor and a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in NY, Massachusetts and Connecticut. Together, we’re diving into how social media can serve as a breeding ground for comparison, misinformation, and, surprise surprise, worsening self-esteem.
Lily Thrope, LCSW is the founder of Thrope Therapy LCSW PLLC, a group psychotherapy practice located in Midtown Manhattan. Thrope Therapy specializes in supporting individuals who experience eating disorders, disordered eating, low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and LGBTQ+ clients. Lily helps her clients find the confidence to face these issues and find ways to live their happiest and most authentic lives. that they want in their lives. Thrope Therapy is built on the belief that each and every person deserves support and a safe space to work towards their most fulfilled and happy self.
Tweetable Quotes"Social media is not inherently bad or good... It is what we make of it or how it impacts us." - Rachelle Heinemann
"You cannot possibly give general advice …. that would apply to everyone." - Rachelle Heinemann
"It’s this pressure to constantly prove yourself and show who you are, but like be really cool and beautiful and thin and all these other ideals." - Lily Thrope
“The problem with social media is that those people who are validating you often don't know you… They're not validating you as a human being. They're validating you as a square on an app on a phone.” - Lily Thrope
“Social media is not going anywhere, so instead of saying how terrible it is, we have to say, how can we support our clients in setting good boundaries with it?” - Lily Thrope
“If your strategy is to exit out [from distressing situations], you're not going to be able to grow together with people, and you will end up more lonely.” - Lily Thrope
ResourcesConnect with Lily on Instagram!
https://thropetherapy.com/
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Stop caring what others think about you.
Now that I’ve got your attention, let me back up. We’ve all been there—so consumed by “what will they think?” that we lose sight of what we think. But if there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s that trying to please everyone just makes you boring.
Tweetable Quotes“It's not necessarily about caring less because there's no magic in that. It's how do we care just as much, but then make decisions based on what we need, our values.” - Rachelle Heinemann
“For those of the people who, at least on the outside, look like they don't care, I think for the most part, they're faking it.” - Rachelle Heinemann
“Can we be impacted less by our anticipation of other people's reactions or responses?” - Rachelle Heinemann
“If I push you away, you don't learn. I don't get to teach. I don't get to learn from other people. And one of the things that I absolutely love is being an educator.” - Rachelle Heinemann
“It's not necessarily about caring less. It's about doing things that feel better for you, that feel more aligned with your values, and keeping other people in mind.” - Rachelle Heinemann
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ADHD + a complicated relationship with food = a recipe for disaster. Am I right?
If you’ve ever found yourself forgetting key ingredients at the grocery store or using snacks to calm your brain from its chaotic circus act. If you're nodding along and thinking, "Yep, that's me," then listen up.
In this episode, I’m joined by Brittany Modell, a registered dietitian and certified intuitive eating counselor who knows exactly how overwhelming it can be to juggle all the things, especially when ADHD makes remembering groceries or even meals feel like an Olympic event.
Tweetable Quotes“When someone struggles with something like ADHD, eating disorder recovery can get really, really complicated for a variety of reasons.” - Rachelle Heinemann
"Self-compassion is a practice, it's not something you experience once or twice, and all of a sudden you have compassion for yourself." - Brittany Modell
"ADHD looks different for various people." - Brittany Modell
"Food is powerful, but food is not the end-all, be-all... it can play a role, but my brain's not going to change because I ate differently." - Brittany Modell
"This is general information. This is not one size fits all." - Brittany Modell
"Routine is really important, and it's hard because people with ADHD tend to struggle with routine, but they can thrive when they have it." - Brittany Modell
ResourcesConnect with Brittany Here!
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Flashback to your teenage years.
What a blissful, uncomplicated time... said no one ever. Adolescence can be a confusing time—so confusing, in fact, that most of us can’t even make sense of our own teenage years even as adults. Prevention happens during these years, and because of that they are complicated.
But here’s the thing: preventing eating disorders, or at least minimizing the chances, is more about fostering self-worth and emotional health than just keeping them off the latest fad diet.
This episode isn’t just for parents who feel like they’re constantly playing catch-up with their kids' mental health. It’s for educators, clinicians, and anyone who's had the absolute pleasure of trying to navigate the tangled web of teenage emotions.
Tweetable Quotes"The words that you say about someone's body matter. They matter so much." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Let's go in with an open mind; we have no idea what a person is like before we get to know them." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Self-compassion is really one of the most powerful sources of coping and resilience that we have, and resilience building is very important for people's mental health." - Marcy Forta
“How people internalize the messages they hear actually makes a very big difference.” - Marcy Forta
“The most important thing about talking with your child about social media is that they can feel comfortable to come to you when they hear or see something that is concerning to them, they don't feel like, 'Oh, my mom's going to judge me.'” - Marcy Forta
ResourcesConnect with Marcy Here!
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Calling moms everywhere: if you have ever found yourself standing in front of the fridge, starving but too tired to decide between a sandwich or just grabbing the entire pint of ice cream, then stick with me, because I’m talking to you.
Mom life is amazing (read: exhausting). But let’s be real, it’s all about balancing both motherhood and a healthy relationship with food. Spoiler alert: it’s not as easy as those Instagram influencers make it look.
Tweetable Quotes"The number one thing you have to do is nourish yourself." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Don't skip any meal or snack ever." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Treat yourself as if it's a normal thing and it's not because you deserve it or you earned it." - Rachelle Heinemann
"Think about the way that we've methodically gone through different parts of the day during a random person's day today, and think about the different intricacies about your life, and your week, and your month, and apply some of these ideas to your life." - Rachelle Heinemann
ResourcesGrab my Journal Prompts Here!
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Are eating disorders actually a type of addiction?
It’s easy to think of eating disorders as, well, a disorder. But when we start to really dive into the nitty gritty, are they actually considered an addiction?
In today’s episode, I am joined by Iris Epstein.
Since 2004, Iris Epstein RD, CDCES, CEDS-S, CAI has focused her career on eating disorder awareness, treatment, family coaching, and intervention at her practice in Pomona, New York. Her philosophy is one of compassion along with hard work to break through the determined mindset that takes hold of people with eating disorders. By addressing the medical and malnutrition issues that give eating disorders their strength, we can weaken the grip they have on our clients. Just as there are many causes for eating disorders, it often takes a variety of strategies to treat them. Iris is confident that her team at the Nutrition Improvement Center can help provide a successful path for our clients to resume a healthy and balanced relationship with food and their bodies. Iris recently graduated from the ARISE intervention program where she received her certification in family coaching and intervention work for addiction. She believes that the addiction model has a place in the eating disorder recovery process.
Note: We’re celebrating three amazing years of the Understanding Disordered Eating podcast! Just as a reminder, this is the last episode for the next two weeks! We will be back on September 10th. In the meantime, catch up on our older episodes—they're still gems!
Tweetable Quotes"Eating disorders just don't happen fully. It starts sometimes as innocently as having a diet.” - Iris Epstein
"When you remove the substance, then their brain feels relief and calm. When it's there, their brains go into more of a depressed mode, an anxious mode." - Iris Epstein
"You have to reestablish good connections with people. And I think that's where the secrecy and everything comes into play." - Iris Epstein
"Eating disorders are a coping mechanism for survival." - Iris Epstein
ResourcesConnect with Iris Epstein here!
Grab my Journal Prompts Here!
Grab the Replay of the Resistance in Treatment Webinar
Now accepting new clients! Find out if we're a good fit!
LEAVE A REVIEW + help someone who may need this podcast by sharing this episode.
Be sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter here!
You can connect with me on Instagram @rachelleheinemann, through my website www.rachelleheinemann.com, or email me directly at [email protected]
- Visa fler
