Avsnitt
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How do we get more comfortable talking about sex? Is it “okay” to add sex to our schedules… or should it only be spontaneous? What if one of us is never in the mood?
In this episode, I’m detailing FIVE things that passionate couples do differently - taken from the teachings of Esther Perel. I’ll explain the concept of “responsive desire” (and how to be intimate when you’re not in the mood), what to do if it feels like your partner is only ever “taking” from you, and the importance of consistency with physical intimacy - for both partners!
Listen in if you’re ready and wanting to ignite deeper passion inside your most intimate relationship.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
2:36 - I rarely want to work out… but I never regret it
5:50 - When it feels like all he wants to do is take from you
9:07 - You cannot punish your partner for this!
10:41 - Your relationship needs physical intimacy (consistently)
13:40 - Maintenance sex v. Spontaneous sex
Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
Could your marriage be the cornerstone to success in every other part of your life? In this episode, I invite you to consider the potentially transformative concept of placing your relationship above even your children and career…
I explain why many of us naturally prioritize other aspects of life (kids, work, etc.) and the subtle-yet-profound impact this could be having in our marriages. This is a divisive topic, so I invite you to tune in and consider what this means for you!
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
2:49 - Can your marriage be the foundation… for everything else in your life?
4:18 - Most of us love our kids unconditionally. What about our life partners?
6:22 - What else can thrive… when your marriage thrives?
8:04 - But prioritizing your marriage shouldn’t feel like a chore
11:20 - What’s ONE thing you can do to prioritize your marriage?
Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
Saknas det avsnitt?
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If you feel stuck in indecision about whether you should stay in your relationship or leave it… you likely don’t have enough information to make your decision (yet).
That’s the problem my client was facing: Her marriage had been struggling for years, and now she found herself deep inside an affair - no longer in love with her husband but undecided about what to do next.
In this episode, I walk you through the 90-day strategy we used to help her come to clarity, plus the difference between thoughtful decision-making and “convenient” decisions. If you feel stuck in indecision about your marriage, this episode is for you!
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
2:09 - What do you want? (What don’t you want?)
5:18 - What are your reasons WHY?
7:21 - The 90-day ground rules for success
9:20 - But the goal is NOT “wedded bliss in 90 days!”
12:23 - Ask this question if you’re feeling stuck
Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
Who am I, and why should you listen to me?
The work of relationship coaching is personal, and today I want to share more about who I am, personally and professionally - so you can see behind-the-scenes of my life and work.
In this episode, I share my personal story of a first marriage that ended in divorce, how I’ve been on all sides of affairs, and why my second marriage is thriving. You’ll also hear about what led me to relationship coaching, the work I did previously, and how I finally discovered peace and happiness - using my own life coaching tools!
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
1:58 - The simple reason I married my first husband
6:51 - I thought the answer was to find the right person…
8:20 - Why my second marriage is thriving 10 years later!
11:46 - This is what I did for work, prior to relationship coaching
16:09 - The first time I felt my heart leap out of my chest
21:08 - Who are my people? What matters to me? Where am I from? What do I believe in?
29:27 - How I finally discovered peace
Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
Oh, the age-old dilemma in nearly every marriage… One partner needs emotional connection before physical intimacy; the other requires sex to feel connected.
Both partners require both types of connection. But which comes first?
In this episode, I take a stand on which type of connection *must* come first, plus why we need different things to feel connected, what to do if you feel like your partner is only ever ‘taking’ from you, and how you might be exacerbating the disconnection in your marriage.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
1:07 - We need BOTH emotional & physical connection… which comes first?
4:05 - The dilemma: I’m not meeting your needs, because you’re not meeting mine
5:47 - But this is what HAS to come first - no matter what
8:00 - Your partner is not trying to take something from you…Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon
Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life by Vanessa & Xander Marin -
When one of my clients discovered her husband’s betrayal, she consciously chose to stay in the marriage… but she also struggled to know how to move forward from there.
Would his past behavior determine their success or failure? Could new patterns of behavior “save” their marriage?
In this episode, I’m talking about the problems with ONLY looking to the past for predictions of the future, plus how we can start trusting ourselves and move forward after a marriage upset.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
2:10 - The best predictor of the future is the past, unless…
7:05 - How new patterns of behavior *change* your relationship
10:07 - You can’t have one foot in the past & one foot in the future…
13:08 - Here’s how you can start trusting YOURSELF
Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
If you can get better at this one thing… every single relationship in your life will get better!
Most relationship issues can be traced back to problems with communication, right? There might be a lack of communication, a handful of miscommunications, a lack of understanding… the list goes on.
But here’s what I want you and your partner BOTH to consider: Are you as interested in what your partner has to say… as you are in being seen & heard?
In this episode, we’ll dig into this question, and I’ll share 5 practical tools to help you get better at both listening and being heard.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
01:10 - You know what it’s like to feel unseen & unheard (so does your partner…)
04:53 - It gets harder when your identity is wrapped up in the conversation
07:35 - When it’s time to “close your mouth & open your ears”
08:31 - Most people do not have practice being fully present…
13:15 - Are you listening to him, too?
Mentioned In This Episode:
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
How can I fix our marriage if he doesn’t think anything is wrong? What can I do if my needs aren’t being met by my partner? What information should I share with my kids about our divorce?
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear from three callers who are stuck at an impasse and struggling to move forward. Together we’ll get clear about what’s necessary to make a change and how to take the first step.What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
00:55 - She wants to work on the marriage, but he says it’s “fine”
04:46 - Your husband is NOT a jerk…
07:55 - He wants physical connection, but she needs emotional connection first
11:20 - Who should make the first move?
16:52 - They’re getting divorced: What information should they share with their kids?
20:36 - What your children feel TODAY is not how they’ll feel FOREVER
26:16 - The better you do *this* one thing, the smoother your relationships will be
Mentioned In This Episode: -
When one or both partners in a marriage is neurodivergent, you face quite unique challenges… In this episode, I’m joined by Dayna Abraham to explore neurodivergent marriage and more!
Now, you don’t need a diagnosis of ADHD, OCD, autism, etc. to enjoy this episode… rather, Dayna explains how learning to communicate better with your partner is actually about understanding them (and yourself!) better - neurodivergent or otherwise.
You’ll also learn about neurodivergent labels & diagnoses, the wide variety of neurodivergent experience, how neurodivergence can impact marital intimacy & affection, and how you might build better systems & processes within a neurodivergent marriage. Plus, Dayna shares her own framework for thriving inside a marriage with one or both neurodivergent partners. (This framework applies to parenting, business, and more!)
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
01:40 - The difference between a label & a diagnosis
06:59 - Neurodivergent people receive 10X more negative feedback…
11:45 - The female experience of being neurodivergent
15:28 - What to do if you think your partner is neurodivergent
23:20 - How to NOT take your partner’s neurodivergence personally
27:54 - Neurodivergence, intimacy & affection
31:08 - How to build systems & processes in a neurodivergent marriage
40:40 - Dayna’s frameworks for neurodivergent parenting, marriage & more
48:38 - Okay, radical acceptance… but what about unacceptable behavior?
57:44 - The most beautiful part of Dayna’s neurodivergent marriage
Mentioned In This Episode: -
Feeling a loss of attraction and desire for your partner is very common… even when you’re recovering your marriage to a healthy place.
Many of us think that a “spicy” marriage (or an intimate connection) is what’s lost to our youthful naivety or the “magic” of something new. But it’s actually about biology.
In this episode, I’m going to get a little nerdy and talk about healthy hormones, PLUS 4 practical ways you can invite desire into your marriage and your life.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
4:53 - We can’t talk about desire without talking about your hormones
8:16 - Your body needs these 3 things to feel desire
12:36 - Does your relationship still feel… fun?
15:57 - The fastest way to connect with your partner
18:31 - Desire isn’t something you “make” happen
21:15 - Rekindling desire is about action & effort
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected Marriage
Mentioned In This Episode:How to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
When’s the last time you felt truly heard by your partner? When’s the last time you enjoyed a serious conversation together… or agreed on a solution after an argument?
Errors in communication are the most common problem I see with unhappy couples - because men and women communicate differently! And we often communicate for very different reasons.
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, we’ll explore the art of communicating within a heterosexual partnership, and I’ll provide 4 tips for more effective communication between men and women.
0:54 - Women communicate to build connection (men do not)4:49 - Men & women solve problems in different ways6:22 - It’s not about who does it “right” & who does it “wrong” 10:28 - Can you be braver (and bolder) with your communication boundaries? 14:10 - Listen better by asking THIS question16:05 - The #1 reason happy couples are actually happy
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:Mentioned In It’s Time for a Different Conversation in Your Marriage
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected Marriage
Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage? Book a Truth & Clarity Session.How to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
How do I know if my spouse is genuinely changing or not? Can I trust his new good behavior will last? What can we do if my husband wants to open our marriage and I’m not sure? How do I move forward after my husband’s emotional affair with a coworker?
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear from three callers who want to understand how to encourage positive changes to make a marriage last, what to do when a partner comes out as bisexual, and how to move forward after an emotional affair.
3:13 - How to appreciate the good things he does to encourage lasting change
8:24 - Her husband wants to open their marriage - does she?
10:03 - When you both want to feel seen and accepted (but neither of you does)
14:04 - The reality of emotional affairs (i.e. The Danger Zone)
18:13 - It’s not about the other woman
20:51 - What’s really going on when things go “bad”Mentioned In Q&A: New "Good" Behavior, Emotional Affairs and an Open Marriage
Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage? Book a Truth & Clarity Session.If you have a question you’d like me to answer on the podcast, leave me a voice message at 727-537-0359.
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
Men and women communicate very differently and for very different reasons. And if you don’t understand how and why, it’ll cause problems that strain your relationship. So what do you need to know and do differently to communicate better in your marriage
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about why men and women communicate differently, why it can cause issues, and the brain chemistry involved. I’ll also teach you four things you can do to improve the communication between you and your partner.
00:54 - Ways in which men and women communicate differently and the reasons behind it7:15 - How to be more direct in your communication with your husband (without coming across like a bitch)
10:20 - Two ways to be braver in your marriage and how they help your partner show up better inside the relationship
12:33 - An example of how understanding one another makes communication easier in marriage
14:10 - How to listen better when your partner is ready to share something with you
Mentioned In Four Ways to Improve Communication Between You and Your Spouse
Book a Truth & Clarity Session
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
You know how each person can see something different when looking at the same piece of art? Perspective is the same way.
Your perspective is uniquely yours, and it’s built through belief which is shaped in the first few years of your life by multiple things like your environment and the people in it. In that way, your beliefs are also like art, bringing together multiple elements to create the big picture that is you. But, if you’re not careful, some beliefs you hold can play a part in destroying any relationship you have.
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about the one belief you might have that can ruin almost any relationship. You’ll learn a simple thing you can do to become a little more conscious in all of your relationships and discover how this subtle shift can improve your marriage00:25 - The lost art that’s affecting your relationships
2:49 - A couple of reasons why you argue with others over perspective
4:30 - The problem with the concept of right versus wrong
6:37 - The benefits of looking at things in your relationships through the lens of perspective
8:57 - What happens when you’re simply curious about your partner’s perspective
Mentioned In The One Belief That Will Ruin Any Relationship
Stay or Go? By Sharon Pope
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
Feeling frustrated by the same interactions and experiences with your partner? Perhaps you and your spouse are having the same arguments over and over again, or you’re still not affectionate with each other.
How will your life look and feel a year from now, though, if you do nothing different? You might think you know the answer, but you’ll only be partly right.
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about two reasons why your life won’t be the same next year if you don’t do things differently. I’ll also give you suggestions on how to change your approach to the problems in your marriage so that it has a chance to evolve into something better.
1:10 - The first (and most important) reason why your life a year from now won’t still be the same by doing nothing different
3:49 - The one inevitability that means things won’t be different for you next year
5:22 - A suggestion for doing something different that puts you in the fast lane to change
6:53 - The assumption you need to drop to get things moving in a different direction
8:03 - One of the more powerful things you can do that most people resist (at least at first)
10:01 - How to get out of the inertia and implement the suggestion of your choice
11:45 - The result if you remain passive and ignore the rumble strip in your marriage
Mentioned In What Will Life Be Like One Year From Now (If You Do Nothing Different)?
Stay or Go? By Sharon Pope
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
If you need to end a relationship, you want to try to do it in the most loving and peaceful way possible. This is something I say often, but there’s one problem with it: not everyone wants to be loving and peaceful about separating.
One of my clients, parent coach Julie Zivah, finds herself in a highly contentious divorce with her husband of 22 years. Yet she has found a way to keep her peace while still going through the process. And she wanted to be on the podcast to take us through her journey as someone in a high-conflict divorce.
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about how Julie’s divorce has gone thus far and how she’s learned to stay calm and zen. You’ll learn about the hard realizations she’s had about her relationship with her husband and kids, the tools she’s used to help navigate her situation mentally and emotionally, and her supportive mindset and approach as her family’s dynamic continues to be in transition.
2:20 - Julie describes where she was mentally and emotionally in her marriage when we started working together
5:40 - How Julie got to the decision to end her relationship with her husband
8:35 - Does Julie ever get cold feet and feel tempted to change her mind?
11:21 - The moment Julie knew her divorce wasn’t going to be loving and peaceful (and an important side note about her approach to this conversation)
14:15 - Julie shares one of the hardest realizations in this process and how her relationship with her kids has changed
21:57 - The importance of a dependable adult for kids and teaching your kids how to manage difficult people
24:05 - How Julie’s experience has changed her parent coaching practice
26:03 - Collaborative divorce proceedings with a high-conflict personality and what happened when Julie switched to a non-collaborative process
31:09 - The tool that helps Julie do things with love and kindness while going through a difficult divorce
34:40 - How Julie kept her peace when things got really tough and she had moments of doubt
38:47 - The importance of using helpful tools when you’re not in crisis
40:14 - Julie’s advice if you suspect a high-conflict separation on the horizon
46:01 - Where Julie’s relationships with her partner and kids stand today
Mentioned In How to Keep Your Peace Through a High-Conflict Divorce
High Conflict Institute
Splitting and Don’t Alienate the Kids! by Bill Eddy
Book a Truth & Clarity Session
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
Are you avoiding spending time alone with your partner? Do you feel like you’ve lost momentum on going forward with your divorce decision after talking about it with your spouse? I answered a couple of questions from Tiffany and another caller who found themselves in these situations.
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about how you get to a place of disconnection in your marriage and how the way you approach the divorce conversation with your partner can cause you to waver on your decision. I’ll also teach you how to build your muscle of discomfort to help you stop avoiding your husband and how you can move the separation process along as smoothly as possible.
0:40 - A choice between befriending a little discomfort or a lifetime of avoiding your husband
4:08 - Why sometimes you avoid being alone with your partner
5:35 - How to start breaking down the buffers you’ve become used to in your relationship
9:48 - A common thing that happens in marriages with kids
12:45 - Why the conversation to end your marriage is just the first of many
16:56 - The importance of how you enter a conversation with your partner about separation
18:49 - How to move the separation and divorce process along as peacefully and loving as possible
Mentioned In Avoiding Time Alone and a Divorce Discussion Gone Wrong
Have a Question? Leave Me a Voicemail Message at 727-537-0359.
Book a Truth & Clarity Session
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
So you’ve decided to end your relationship in divorce. What’s the first thing you should do next? The answer might surprise you.
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about a much more productive first step you can take instead of the one that most likely immediately comes to mind. I’ll also teach you why it helps you commit to your decision to end your marriage.
1:19 - Your first instinct after you realize divorce is the answer
2:08 - What a wobble list is, and the point of making one
4:18 - The process of creating your wobble list (with examples)
7:00 - Why you will second-guess your commitment to divorce at some point
7:55 - Scenarios that can cause you to second-guess yourself most often
Mentioned In The First Thing You Should Do When You Decide to Get a Divorce
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected Marriage
Free, On-Demand Training: Undoing I DoHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
You feel like you’re at the end of your rope when it comes to your marriage. Divorce looks like the inevitable next step...but is it?
What if there was another way? What if there was the possibility of still saving your relationship by evolving it into a newer, better version?
In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about the divorce alternative that many of my clients have used. I’ll teach you the similarity between relationships and technology and reveal how one client has started evolving her marriage.
1:03 - How “Julie’s” and “Chris’” relationship dynamic changed in 23 years
3:05 - How you need to think of marriage evolution
6:09 - How we get to the point of being stuck in the same miserable cycle in our relationship
9:03 - What the process of evolving your marriage depends on
10:36 - What marriage is and the change in “Julie’s” marriage with “Chris” as it began to evolve
13:11 - What if your marriage can’t evolve beyond where it is right now?
Mentioned In Instead of Divorce, Can You Save Your Marriage By Evolving It?
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected MarriageHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register -
“What other people think of you doesn’t matter.”
You can hear that a thousand times. You can even tell it to yourself over and over until you’re blue in the face. And while a select few may not be rattled by it, most of us feel the effects of someone else’s judgment.
But you can bounce back instead of letting it affect you for weeks, months, or a lifetime. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn three ways of thinking about this that’ll help soften and shorten the blow to just a few days (or even hours) of hurt feelings. I’ll even share with you how I’ve learned to deal with judgment from family members about what I do in my business.
3:24 - Why the way someone feels about you has nothing to do with you
5:50 - What you can’t control (even if you think you can) and why
8:29 - The only opinion that ultimately matters (and a scenario that highlights why)
10:37 - The choices we all face when someone judges us
Mentioned In Worrying About What Others Think of You? How to Bounce Back Quickly
Finding Clarity In A Disconnected Marriage
Stay or Go? How to Find Confidence and Clarity So You Can Fix Your Marriage, or Move Forward Without Regret by Sharon PopeHow to Get Unstuck & Move Forward Without Regret
Monday, April 29th - Thursday, May 2nd, 2024
4:00pm ET | 3:00pm CT | 2:00pm MT | 1:00pm PT
Get all of the details and register here:
https://thedisconnectedmarriage.com/register - Visa fler
