Avsnitt
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Bob Cullen isn't a doctor or a traditional academic — he's a man who spent his early life around violence and addiction, spent years in prison, and has spent the time since trying to understand where that violence actually comes from. Now finishing a master's and preparing to start a PhD, he leads the Success Stories Programme, running workshops with men — including in prisons and on probation — about patriarchy, masculinity and the beliefs that quietly shape how boys become men.
In this conversation, Bob and Laura trace violence back to its roots: the way boys are taught that emotion is weakness, how shame and poverty drive harm, and why Bob believes we can't reduce violence against women without understanding masculinity itself. He's honest about the misogyny he still hears from men when no women are around, and clear that shaming men or simply telling them to "talk more" misses how the harm is learned in the first place.
The episode also turns inward. Bob speaks openly about the drugs, the self-harm and the years he couldn't look at himself in the mirror, and about the education, meditation and steady relationships that slowly turned things around. It closes on regret, accountability and self-forgiveness — and why, after all the work he's done, he still chooses to hold on to some of the guilt he carries.
Please note: this episode discusses violence, prison, abuse, misogyny and suicide, and may be difficult to listen to. Support links are included below.
🔑 Key PointsViolence has roots we rarely look at
Bob argues we'll never reduce violence against women by focusing on it alone — it has to be traced back to patriarchy and how masculinity is formed.
Boys learn early that emotion is weakness
From "boys don't cry" to the fear of being called weak by friends, boys are taught to suppress feeling and to prove they'll use violence if needed.
Shame is one of the biggest drivers of violence
Drawing on James Gilligan's work, Bob links most harm to shame, poverty and exposure to violence, and notes people are usually victims before they become perpetrators.
Misogyny didn't start with social media
He traces how men talk about women when none are around back through history, rather than blaming figures like Andrew Tate alone.
"Just get men talking" isn't enough
Bob explains why shaming men or telling them to open up misses how the harm is learned, and why his work is built on accountability and community instead.
Change came through education and connection
Getting clean in prison, meditation, journaling and a teacher named Andrea opened a path into study, feminism and the Success Stories work he now leads.
Accountability over easy self-forgiveness
Bob speaks honestly about the guilt he still carries, and why he chooses to hold it: not to punish himself, but as a reminder of who he doesn't want to become.
📚 ResourcesViolence: Our Deadly Epidemic and Its Causes — James Gilligan
On shame, poverty and the roots of violence.
The Will to Change — bell hooks
On men, masculinity and love.
The Patriarchs — Angela Saini
How patriarchy took hold.
Success Stories Programme
The anti-patriarchy, anti-violence programme Bob runs with men.
Samaritans Ireland
Free 24/7 on 116 123.
Pieta
Free 24/7 crisis support on 1800 247 247.
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — Introduction and the Success Stories Program
03:52 — Patriarchy, domination and masculinity
06:34 — Why focusing only on violence against women falls short
09:56 — "Boys don't cry" and the fear of weakness
12:45 — Shame, poverty and the roots of violence
13:40 — Misogyny's long history, from Pandora to Descartes
27:40 — Why "men just need to talk" isn't enough
32:56 — Victims before perpetrators
41:30 — Accountability, integrity and community
50:00 — Drugs, self-harm and going to prison
63:00 — The teacher who changed everything
79:23 — Regret, accountability and self-forgiveness
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, child and adolescent psychotherapist Dr Coleman Noctor explains why so many of us feel anxious and "behind," even when life is objectively fine.
He shows how the gap between expectation and reality fuels anxiety, why chasing "exceptional" leaves us discontent, and how aiming for his "four to seven zone" can bring us back to balance.
🔑Key Points
• Why anxiety often lives in the gap between expectation and reality
• How "demonising average" sets most of us up to feel like we're failing
• Why happiness is a passing moment, not a permanent state
• The "four to seven zone" as a practical way to aim for balance
🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Saknas det avsnitt?
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Becca Maberly did everything "right." An A-grade student with an obstetrician father, she got to the hospital, had her baby with no pain relief, and was home for lunch - certain she was going to be brilliant at motherhood. Then the postnatal period arrived, and she went, in her words, straight to the bottom of the class.
In this honest, funny and disarming conversation, Becca and Laura pull apart the gap between what we're told motherhood will feel like and what it can actually be. Becca talks about feeling like an unnatural mother, the loneliness of the long hours in between, and the maternal rage that surges from nought to a hundred over spilled milk. She shares the day she asked her GP for help and was sent to a psychiatric unit, only to be handed a leaflet and told to count to ten.
She also names something few people hear about: D-MER, or dysphoric milk ejection reflex - the wave of crushing sadness that hit her at every let-down, which she only understood years later. The conversation moves on through renegotiating a relationship after a baby, a ruptured ectopic pregnancy that nearly went unnoticed, and why Becca now believes the meaning of life is simply finding your own balance. It's a reminder that if you're not loving every moment, you're not failing - and you're far from alone.
🔑 Key PointsFrom A-grade student to the bottom of the class
Becca sailed through pregnancy and birth, then found the postnatal period the hardest thing she'd ever done — and the mismatch between expectation and reality floored her.
"Enjoy every moment" can do real harm
Being told to treasure a stage you are quietly struggling through can leave mothers feeling ashamed and isolated rather than supported.
Not bonding straight away is more common than we admit
Becca loved her son but didn't feel the instant, overwhelming rush she'd been promised — and says a baby can feel like a stranger for a long time.
D-MER is real and rarely talked about
Dysphoric milk ejection reflex brought a homesick, crushing sadness at every let-down; naming it, years later, changed how she understood it.
Maternal rage often comes from feeling unsupported
The nought-to-a-hundred surge over something tiny is frequently about exhaustion, unmet expectations and carrying too much alone.
Asking for help doesn't always get the right response
When Becca told her GP she was angry and shouting, she was sent to a psychiatric unit and handed a CBT leaflet — a reminder of how far perinatal support still has to go.
Talking openly is its own kind of therapy
Ranting honestly online led Becca to realise she wasn't the only one — and connecting with other women became the support she couldn't find elsewhere.
Honesty is the most useful thing we can offer new parents
Not to frighten anyone, but to sit somewhere between "you'll be great" and "this could be the hardest thing you ever do" — the truth is usually in between.
📚 ResourcesA Mother Place
Becca's platform for honest, unfiltered motherhood
Postnatal Depression (HSE)
HSE information and support
Talk Therapy (HSE)
Talk therapy and counselling options
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — Intro
01:51 — From A-grade student to the bottom of the class
04:00 — Calling BS on "enjoy every moment"
04:52 — The feeding nobody warns you about
09:31 — Loneliness and the hours in between
11:58 — The GP, a psychiatric unit and a CBT leaflet
15:13 — D-MER: the sadness that comes with let-down
19:19 — Maternal rage and the spilled-milk surge
22:16 — When your baby feels like a stranger
24:02 — Renegotiating the relationship after a baby
37:11 — Her book, and a ruptured ectopic pregnancy
42:28 — The meaning of life is balance
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, skin expert and Skin Nerd founder Jennifer Rock explains why so much health and skincare advice online is built to entertain rather than educate — and how to tell the difference.
She makes a straight-talking case for checking qualifications, standards and the source behind any advice before you act on it, so the next viral "must buy" doesn't catch you out.
🔑Key Points
• Why qualifications and standards matter in skincare and health
• How social media is designed to entertain, not educate
• Why you should always check the source of your advice
• A simple filter for viral trends and "must buy" claims
🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Laura sits down with community pharmacist Darragh Connolly, who has built a men's health service — Men's Health Downunder — around something most clinics rush past: helping men get their sexual function back after prostate surgery. It's a candid, frequently very funny conversation about a subject usually wrapped in silence and shame.
Darragh explains the male anatomy in plain (and memorable) terms, why nightly "micro-erections" keep the penis healthy, and what actually changes after a prostatectomy. He walks through how a penis pump works, what constriction rings are for, and why this isn't only for men who've had cancer surgery — smoking, diabetes, spinal injury, certain medicines and simply getting older can all play a part.
Running through all of it is a hopeful message: a prostate diagnosis or surgery is not the end of sex, intimacy is far more than penetration, and men well into their 80s can still enjoy a full sex life. Darragh also makes the case for meeting men's sexual health at the pharmacy counter, not only the consultant's clinic.
🔑 Key PointsSexual health is health — and still taboo
There's deep shame and silence around men's genitals and sexual function, and Darragh's whole approach is to demystify it, often with humour, so men actually seek help.
Micro-erections keep the penis healthy
Men have around five micro-erections a night that bring blood, oxygen and nutrients to the tissue; without them it's "use it or lose it", and the penis can shrink and lose function.
Erectile dysfunction has many causes, not just prostate surgery
Ageing, smoking, diabetes, lower-back trauma, spinal injury and some medications can all affect erectile function.
How a penis pump actually works
Used for five to ten minutes a day, it draws blood into the penis like training a muscle, improving vascular and nerve health over time.
Constriction rings let men maintain an erection for sex
Paired with the pump, a constriction ring traps blood to hold an erection for penetrative sex — but should never be left on more than six to eight minutes.
A prostate diagnosis is not the end of sex
With the right tools, men who hadn't had an erection in months or years can have penetrative sex again — and intimacy is always more than penetration.
Know the warning signs of prostate trouble
Dribbling, a weak stream, going more often (especially at night) and "stage fright" can point to an enlarged prostate; Movember is a good place to learn the signs.
📚 ResourcesMen's Health Downunder
Darragh Connolly's Irish men's health service and the surgical-grade penis pumps discussed
Movember
the men's health charity Darragh recommends for prostate cancer, testicular cancer and male suicide awareness
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — Welcome and sponsor
01:36 — Why a pharmacist is talking about men's health
03:24 — How Darragh got into men's health
04:32 — What a prostatectomy actually involves
07:28 — Male anatomy explained simply
13:48 — Micro-erections and "use it or lose it"
20:55 — How a penis pump works
24:31 — Constriction rings and maintaining an erection
38:33 — The prostate and its warning signs
52:44 — How Viagra and Cialis were discovered
57:00 — Low-dose Cialis, the pump and the post-surgery "void"
1:01:24 — Couples, intimacy and a hopeful note
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, GP Dr Mick Crotty explains why weight is far less within our conscious control than we are led to believe — and why so many people carry a load of self-blame they never deserved.
He walks Laura through the genetics of appetite, the brain's reward response to food, and the "set point" it quietly defends, which is why weight so often returns after a diet. It's a clip that gently takes apart the "just eat less and move more" myth.
🔑Key Points
• Why "just eat less and move more" is an oversimplification
• How genetics and the appetite system shape hunger and fullness
• What the brain's "set point" is, and why weight often returns after dieting
• Why this is a medical issue, not a personal failing
🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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How many women quietly put up with heavy bleeding, painful periods or a difficult coil fitting, telling themselves it is just part of being a woman?
In this episode, Laura sits down with obstetrician and gynaecologist Dr Áine Dempsey, who works at BlackRock Women's Health and at the Rotunda, for an honest, practical conversation about the things women are so often told to live with - and what can actually be done about them.
Áine explains what a hysteroscopy really involves, why polyps and fibroids drive heavy bleeding, and when the Mirena coil is the right first step before ablation or surgery. She is candid about pain relief during coil fittings, the six-month settling period, and where the copper coil fits in.
The conversation moves into perimenopause and HRT, smear tests, HPV and colposcopy, and the realities of painful sex, vaginismus and caring for women who carry past sexual trauma. She closes on labour ward life, her own two pregnancies, the magic of epidurals, and why no woman should feel she has to suffer in silence.
At its core, this episode is about taking your own symptoms seriously and making your gynae health a priority.
🔑 Key PointsHeavy bleeding is not something to put up with
changing a pad every hour, bleeding for more than five days, or planning your life around your period all count, and there is plenty that can help.
Flooding is a symptom women rarely volunteer
Áine asks directly because most women never mention soaking through their clothes or sheets.
A hysteroscopy is not as frightening as it sounds
a thin camera and a well-briefed team can investigate bleeding, polyps and fibroids, usually without a general anaesthetic.
You deserve proper pain relief for a coil fitting
from paracetamol and ibuprofen beforehand to numbing gel and a local cervical block.
The Mirena coil takes about six months to settle
bloating, tenderness or mood changes often ease, and it can be used as part of HRT.
HRT is about long-term health, not just symptoms
beyond brain fog and night sweats, it supports heart and bone health.
Painful sex is not normal
whether it stems from low oestrogen, endometriosis or past trauma, there are options that help.
You do not have to suffer in silence
if something is affecting your quality of life, make your gynae health a priority.
📚 ResourcesBlackRock Health Women's Health Centre
Hysteroscopy (HSE)
The Mirena and copper coils (HSE)
HRT and menopause treatment (HSE)
Cervical screening and HPV (CervicalCheck, HSE)
⏱️ Timestamps02:04 - Inside a day at BlackRock Women's Health
03:23 - What a hysteroscopy actually involves
06:21 - Polyps, fibroids and heavy bleeding
09:02 - Heavy bleeding and flooding in perimenopause
10:11 - The Mirena coil as a first-line treatment
13:56 - Pain relief and what to expect from a coil fitting
18:02 - The Mirena as part of HRT, and sleep
20:04 - Mental health support through menopause
22:35 - Smear tests, HPV and colposcopy
24:35 - Painful sex and trauma-informed care
29:18 - Vaginismus, physio and the pelvic floor
33:34 - Her own pregnancies and epidurals
37:56 - Don't suffer in silence
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Aimee Donnellan joins Laura to talk about her new book Off the Scales: The Inside Story of Ozempic and the Race to Cure Obesity, and the much bigger story sitting underneath it - how generations of women learned to live with food.
Through interviews with women across the world, Aimee found the same pattern repeating. A trip to a dietitian around the age of seven. A mother quietly carrying her own dieting story, passing it on through Weight Watchers, rice cakes and "don't think cute clothes mean you can come off your diet." For some, GLP-1 medications like Wegovy and Mounjaro have quietened the food noise for the first time in their lives. For others, the more confronting realisation is how differently the world treats them when they shrink.
Aimee also explores how the men in her book relate to their bodies very differently, the rising scale of childhood obesity and the shame attached to it, and why the food industry has barely adjusted to a world where appetite itself is shifting. She and Laura reflect on body positivity, menopause and the pressure women carry at every stage of life, before closing on something simpler - why she thinks the meaning of life comes down to picking up the phone.
🔑 Key Points1. Dieting often starts in childhood — Many of the women Aimee spoke to were first sent to a dietitian around age seven, framing food as something to manage rather than enjoy.
2. Mothers carry the story forward — Weight Watchers, calorie counting and "good" and "bad" foods pass quietly from mother to daughter across generations.
3. Food noise can dominate a life — Constant thoughts about food and shame-based self-talk shape how many women move through the world.
4. GLP-1 drugs change more than weight — When the food noise quietens, work, relationships, shopping and how others treat you can all shift.
5. Men and women relate to weight differently — Men often seek treatment for health reasons, while women carry decades of body criticism and comparison.
6. These drugs are not a quick fix — Muscle loss, side effects, cost and the reality of injecting long-term are rarely talked about honestly.
7. Childhood obesity is rising — Shame and clinics that don't fit larger bodies stop many families seeking help early.
8. The food industry has barely adjusted — Cheap, ultra-processed food still fills shelves, and meaningful change runs into cost and lobbying.
📚 ResourcesOff the Scales: The Inside Story of Ozempic and the Race to Cure Obesity — Aimee Donnellan
⏱️ Timestamps01:00 — Welcome and the focus of the book
03:00 — Why the dieting story starts at age seven
04:30 — Rice cakes, Hershey's sauce and a mother's diet
06:00 — Sarah's first Wegovy injection
07:00 — Losing 70 pounds and a life that changes overnight
12:00 — Menopause, microdosing and Ozempic on the black market
14:00 — Body positivity, celebrity bodies and the shift back
22:00 — Plateaus, muscle loss and life-long drugs
28:00 — A Mars executive on a pharma board
36:00 — How men relate to their bodies differently
41:00 — Childhood obesity, shame and small clinic rooms
44:00 — Food deserts and the cost of real change
56:00 — Picking up the phone and choosing connection
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Darragh Fleming went viral last year for a poem — but this conversation is about everything that came before it. The Cork writer talks to Laura about a childhood spent lost in books, a long detour through sport and self-doubt, and the years he spent convinced he wasn't creative at all.
At seventeen, Darragh lost his close friend Irby to suicide, and the grief changed him profoundly. For years afterwards he felt almost nothing — a numbness he didn't recognise as depression — while quietly performing the emotions other people expected of him. He's honest about the survivor's guilt that made him sabotage his own happiness, the panic attack that became his rock bottom, and how therapy and journaling slowly led him back to writing.
From there the conversation opens out into the work Darragh is known for now: poetry that reimagines what it means to be a man. He and Laura discuss why anger is so often the only emotion men feel allowed to show, how language like "toxic masculinity" can shape the way boys see themselves, and why he believes emotionally healthier men make life safer for everyone. Warm, funny and full of hope, it's also a conversation about creativity in everyday life and Darragh's belief that the meaning of life is found in the people we share it with.
🔑 Key PointsGrief can arrive as numbness, not sadness
After losing his friend Irby at seventeen, Darragh didn't feel constant sadness but a flatness he didn't recognise as depression for years.
Survivor's guilt can quietly sabotage a life
He describes an unconscious sense that he wasn't allowed to be happy, which led him to undo good things whenever they started going well.
Writing became a way back to feeling
Journaling suggested by his therapist turned naturally into poetry, helping him name emotions he otherwise couldn't reach.
Anger is often the only emotion men feel permitted
Darragh argues that sadness, rejection and disappointment frequently come out as anger because men aren't given other outlets.
Language shapes how boys see themselves
Hearing "toxic" almost always paired with "masculinity" can lead young men to believe masculinity itself is something bad.
A lighthouse, not a lifeboat
Rather than trying to rescue everyone, Darragh sees his public work as showing people a way through and reminding them they're not alone.
Success can arrive at the right time
He reflects on being glad his career didn't take off in his twenties, when he wouldn't have been ready to carry it.
📚 ResourcesThoughts Too Big — Darragh's long-running mental health blog
If I Ever Have Boys — Darragh Fleming
If I Ever Have Girls — Darragh Fleming
Waiting for the Good Guys — Darragh Fleming
The Hole — Darragh Fleming, a poem on depression and coping
Dangerous Men — Lucas Jones, the poem Darragh's "If I Ever Have Boys" responded to
Mental health support — Samaritans, freephone 116 123; Pieta, freephone 1800 247 247 or text 51444
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — "My Dad Could Beat Up Your Dad" (cold open)
01:13 — Welcome and introduction
05:40 — Going viral with "If I Ever Have Boys"
14:53 — Why he started writing
17:31 — Losing Irby at seventeen
18:42 — The numbness he didn't know was depression
21:45 — The panic attack, therapy and journaling
33:35 — A lighthouse, not a lifeboat
35:23 — Masculinity, the manosphere and raising sons
42:42 — Language, mental illness and "toxic masculinity"
50:30 — "A Snake Named Snake" and his dad
01:01:36 — Darragh reads "My Dad Could Beat Up Your Dad"
01:03:09 — Advice for young people and the meaning of life
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this episode, consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist Dr Fadi joins Laura for an open, practical conversation about pelvic floor health, incontinence, prolapse and the realities of modern obstetrics.
Dr Fadi explains how childbirth, ageing and menopause affect the pelvic floor, and why so many women end up living with stress incontinence, prolapse and faecal incontinence in silence. He walks through the full range of treatment options — from physiotherapy and pessaries to urethral bulking, Botox, sacral neuromodulation, robotic surgery, and the mesh procedures paused in Ireland since 2018.
The conversation also takes in interstitial cystitis, vaginal oestrogen, the impact of long inductions on older mothers, and the trade-offs women now weigh up between a vaginal delivery and a caesarean section. Dr Fadi closes with a reflection on his time working with Syrian refugees, where he met 13-year-old mothers and a 26-year-old grandmother.
🔑 Key Points1. Pelvic floor problems are common and treatable — Stress incontinence, prolapse and faecal incontinence are usually linked to childbirth, not an inevitable part of being a woman.
2. Mesh for incontinence has been paused in Ireland since 2018 — Ireland is the only country in the world where this procedure is currently unavailable, and patients are being sent to Spain to access it.
3. There is no single fix for incontinence — Treatment depends on the type, from physiotherapy and urethral bulking to mesh slings, Botox into the bladder wall, and sacral neuromodulators.
4. Prolapse is not just the womb — Bladder, womb and rectum can all prolapse, each with their own grade and treatment pathway.
5. Pessaries give women back some control — Different types of pessary can hold a prolapse in place, and many women can learn to manage their own at home.
6. Faecal incontinence is more common than women admit — Third and fourth degree tears at delivery can damage the anal sphincter, and primary repair at the time of birth gives the best outcome.
7. Vaginal oestrogen is a low-risk, high-impact tool — It can ease overactive bladder, recurrent UTIs, dryness, and slow the progression of prolapse after menopause.
8. Older mothers face different trade-offs — Long inductions, instrumental deliveries and unplanned caesareans are more common, which is why some women are now actively asking for a planned section.
📚 ResourcesLove Your Vulva — Laura Dowling
fabÜ Hello Healing
Continence Foundation of Ireland
⏱️ Timestamps01:46 — Introducing Dr Fadi and urogynaecology
02:49 — Why pelvic floor problems happen
04:14 — Assessing pelvis and baby size before delivery
05:09 — Robotic surgery and vault prolapse
06:34 — Stress incontinence and mesh as the gold standard
09:01 — Why mesh has been paused in Ireland
12:31 — Sending Irish patients to Spain for mesh
14:25 — Botox for overactive bladder and Interstim
15:43 — Faecal incontinence and tears at delivery
19:17 — Interstitial cystitis and hyaluronic acid
21:21 — Types and grades of prolapse
24:25 — How a pessary works
28:01 — Surgery for prolapse
34:18 — Vaginal oestrogen and pelvic floor
36:08 — Epidurals and instrumental delivery
37:25 — Why more women are asking for caesareans
45:00 — Working with Syrian refugees
48:32 — Advice for young people and the meaning of life
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, GP Dr Sarah Carty explains why ADHD looks so different in girls and women — and why so many only recognise it years, sometimes decades, after it first showed up.
She tells Laura how the "quiet" presentation — daydreaming, internal restlessness, working twice as hard to look fine — slowly turns into anxiety, perfectionism, and a quiet erosion of confidence. It's a clip that gives language to something a lot of women have silently carried for years.
🔑 Key PointsWhy girls are diagnosed much later than boys — and what gets missedMasking, and how it shows up as perfectionism, daydreaming, or "just being quiet"The link between unrecognised ADHD and anxiety, panic and exhaustionHow girls end up labelling themselves as "stupid", "lazy" or "not academic" — and why that's so far from the truthWhy the right diagnosis can change a person's whole self-story🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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What does proper midlife care actually look like, and who keeps getting left out of it?
In this episode, Laura sits down with Dr Caoimhe Hartley - founder of Menopause Health in Dalkey, clinical lead of the Complex Menopause Clinic in the Rotunda, and clinical lead for women's medicine at the new BlackRock Health Women's Health Centre.
They talk about the women being told no - those over 60 who feel they have missed the boat on HRT, and those who have come through breast cancer and are still struggling with symptoms. Caoimhe explains where the evidence actually sits on bones, blood vessels and brain, why so much of what gets repeated still comes from the Women's Health Initiative, and how modern HRT differs from the older oral preparations.
The conversation moves through midlife weight gain and changing body shape, the rise in adult ADHD diagnoses, and the link between oestrogen and dopamine. They also dig into osteoporosis screening in Ireland, why there is no national DEXA programme, dietary calcium, and the histamine flare some women notice on HRT.
Throughout, Caoimhe keeps coming back to the same point - care should be personal, joined up and built around the woman in front of you.
🔑 Key PointsGuidelines are broad, not personal
They are starting points, not prescriptions, and individual risk-benefit has to lead the conversation.
Women over 60 are not automatically locked out of HRT
There is no longer evidence that starting later raises heart attack risk, and bone benefit is available at any age.
The WHI still shapes the conversation
A flawed 1990s study using Premarin and older progestins is still behind fears that do not map onto modern HRT.
The brain adapts after menopause
Hot flushes, night sweats and brain fog are not designed to last forever, and most women in their 70s and 80s are not symptomatic.
Breast cancer survivors deserve a real menopause conversation
Vaginal oestrogen is generally safe, complex menopause clinics exist for a reason, and non-hormonal options matter.
Body shape change is real and largely hormonal
Central weight gain is one of the top three things women raise, and no specific HRT fixes it, though better sleep and mood help.
ADHD is being unmasked in midlife
As oestrogen falls, dopamine regulation shifts and previously well-managed traits can come to the surface.
Ireland has no national DEXA screening
Despite international guidance over 65, screening here is opportunistic and goes through your GP.
80% of bone density is genetic
Peak bone density is in your 30s, with the remaining fifth shaped by vitamin D, calcium, weight-bearing exercise and not smoking.
📚 ResourcesMenopause Health Clinic, Dalkey
BlackRock Health Women's Health Centre
Women's Health Initiative (WHI)
Danish Osteoporosis Prevention Study (DOPS)
International Osteoporosis Foundation calcium calculator
British Menopause Society
National BreastCheck
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — Why joined-up midlife care matters
03:20 — Women over 60 and HRT
05:10 — Bones, brain and the limits of the 60 cut-off
07:50 — Why the WHI still shapes the conversation
13:00 — The brain adapts after menopause
16:00 — Breast cancer and complex menopause care
20:30 — Cardiovascular health and nitric oxide
23:00 — Body shape change and central weight gain
27:00 — Ozempic and oral progesterone
28:30 — ADHD, oestrogen and dopamine
33:00 — Osteoporosis and DEXA screening in Ireland
41:00 — Histamine, HRT and hay fever
43:00 — Later motherhood and perimenopause overlap
54:30 — Advice for younger women
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, menopause specialist Dr Deirdre Lundy walks Laura through how decisions about HRT and family history of breast cancer actually get made in clinic — and why a blanket "no" rarely tells the full story. If you've ever been handed that flat refusal, this is for you.
She unpacks the difference between "a family history" and a strong family history, why outdated fears around HRT and breast cancer have cost women years of their lives, and why surviving cancer shouldn't mean accepting a wrecked quality of life with no support.
🔑 Key PointsWhat "strong family history" really means — and why it isn't a blanket noHow specialists balance risk versus quality of life in real clinic conversationsWhy so many women have been wrongly told HRT is off the tableThe wider point: survivorship deserves more than "you should be grateful"What to ask for if you've been refused HRT and want a second look🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Pamela Deasy was in her early 40s, working full time and volunteering with the RNLI, when fatigue started dragging her back into bed in the middle of the day. Her bloods were clear. She was told it was perimenopause, then depression. Months passed before a kinesiologist, of all people, pointed at her pancreas — and within days she was in a Cork hospital being told she had a tumour.
In this episode, Pamela sits down with Laura to walk through what happened next: the chemotherapy that made her legs turn to jelly, the five and a half weeks of daily radiotherapy that put her on her back in hospital, and the Whipple surgery that took out the head of her pancreas, part of her stomach, part of her intestine, her gallbladder and her spleen. Then the slower, quieter battle that came after — the seven and a half stone she lost, the survivor guilt nobody warned her about, the Survive and Thrive programme that helped her step back into the world, and the small camping toilet she now keeps in her car because that is the honest reality of life after Whipple surgery.
Pamela also shares why she co-founded Pancreatic Cancer Ireland, what the signs of pancreatic cancer actually look like, and why "listen to your gut and keep going back" might be the most important sentence you hear this week.
🔑 Key PointsWhy fatigue was Pamela's only consistent symptom — and how easy it was to put down to a busy life, perimenopause and then depressionThe signs of pancreatic cancer worth knowing: persistent tiredness, pain in the tummy that radiates to the back, floaty stools, dark urine, jaundice, an itch with no rash, new pre-diabetesWhat Whipple surgery actually involves, and why it is described as life-saving but life-alteringThe realities of life after a rewired digestive system, from packing a change of clothes to always knowing where the toilet isThe chemotherapy side effects that have lingered for years — neuropathy, Raynaud's, cold intoleranceSurvivor guilt, the drop-off in support after the "all clear", and finding her way back through the Survive and Thrive programmeWhy pancreatic cancer is projected to be the second leading cause of cancer-related death by 2030Pamela's everyday philosophy: advocate for yourself, listen to your gut, and treasure the ordinary days📚 ResourcesPancreatic Cancer Ireland
Survive and Thrive
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — Welcome
00:27 — Blackrock Health Women's Health Centre
01:34 — Introducing Pamela and trusting your gut
02:13 — 2018: fatigue, busy work and the RNLI
03:04 — Going back to the GP again and again
05:01 — A kidney scan and "the good news is there's no cancer"
06:00 — Being told she might be depressed
06:16 — A kinesiologist who pointed at her pancreas
07:17 — Jaundice and the alarm bell
08:51 — Friday 7th December: into hospital in Cork
09:22 — "You have a tumour in your pancreas"
12:02 — What Whipple surgery actually is
13:00 — Six rounds of chemotherapy
13:30 — Side effects: falling, neuropathy, Raynaud's
17:48 — Radiotherapy, gemcitabine and six weeks in hospital
21:51 — Whipple surgery on 15 August 2019
23:20 — What was removed during Whipple
24:17 — Losing seven and a half stone and severe cachexia
26:14 — Ascites and the slow road back
29:48 — From patient to survivor
30:23 — Survivor guilt and finding therapy
31:11 — The Survive and Thrive programme
31:38 — Life after a rewired digestive system
34:55 — Pancreatic cancer statistics in Ireland
36:00 — The signs and symptoms worth knowing
42:00 — Setting up Pancreatic Cancer Ireland
47:58 — Where to find Pamela
49:25 — Advice for younger people, and the meaning of life
51:38 — Blackrock Health Women's Health Centre
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, endocrinologist Dr Mary Ryan opens up about losing her husband unexpectedly while raising three small children, and what grief actually looked like for her in the years that followed.
She tells Laura about the shock, the anger, and the long fog of those first two years — and the small, practical things that helped: leaning into bonding routines with her kids, accepting help from family, friends and even her own patients, and letting people in when every part of her wanted to push them away.
🔑 Key PointsWhy grief, in her experience, takes around two years — and why the second Christmas is often the hardestThe "dark hole" she fell into, and what slowly pulled her outHow she kept life moving day-to-day for three young childrenThe quiet role of family, friends and patients in keeping her goingA gentle, honest take on how you don't really "get over" loss — you come through it🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Anxiety author Caroline Foran joins Laura for a deeply personal conversation about parenting a young son recently diagnosed as autistic with a PDA profile, alongside her own long history with anxiety.
Caroline talks openly about the years before the diagnosis, the blame she turned inward, and everything she has had to unlearn about parenting. She explains what PDA — Pervasive Drive for Autonomy — actually looks like day to day, why traditional approaches can make things worse, and the social pressure of being seen to "manage" a child whose nervous system is set on high alert.
She also shares her own anxiety story, from a frightening breakdown at sixteen in Italy through to the severe physical anxiety that took over her twenties. Caroline talks about medication, CBT, and the years of work behind her new book Everything I Wish I'd Known About Anxiety, and why so much of recovery came from showing her body safety rather than trying to outthink her own mind.
🔑 Key PointsDiscovering a PDA profile — Caroline explains Pervasive Drive for Autonomy and what it means for her son's nervous system day to day.
Why traditional parenting backfires — Holding firm boundaries can push a PDA child straight into fight or flight, even at five.
Lowering the demands — A low-demand, declarative-language approach has reshaped everyday life at home.
Performative parenting — The urge to respond to her son for the benefit of onlookers, even with close friends.
The years before the diagnosis — A bumpy COVID start, severe separation anxiety and two preschool attempts that left him distressed.
Caroline's anxiety story — A breakdown at sixteen in Italy and a severe physical episode at twenty-five.
Medication, CBT and self-compassion — Prozac, behavioural therapy and learning to respond to anxiety with kindness rather than self-attack.
Showing the body safety — Why walking, rhythm and bottom-up regulation worked better than trying to master her thoughts.
The cost of constant stimulation — Social media, the pleasure–pain balance and collective anxiety since COVID.
📚 ResourcesEverything I Wish I'd Known About Anxiety
Owning It
PDA Society
Casey Ehrlich (Peace Parents)
Dr Anna Lembke — Dopamine Nation
⏱️ Timestamps02:00 — "Is he non-verbal?" introducing her son
02:30 — Autism with a PDA profile
03:00 — What PDA stands for
04:30 — Nervous system disability and perceived demand
06:00 — Why traditional parenting can backfire
08:00 — Performative parenting in public
10:00 — A pillow on the grass and what dysregulation looks like
13:00 — Blaming herself before the diagnosis
17:00 — Sensory overwhelm and rethinking exposure
20:00 — Preschool, school and what comes next
30:00 — Family life, marriage and never a date night
33:30 — Caroline's anxiety story begins in Italy
39:00 — A severe breakdown at twenty-five
45:00 — Starting medication and what Prozac actually did
51:00 — CBT, behavioural experiments and getting her life back
56:00 — Showing the body safety
59:00 — Social media and the pleasure–pain balance
01:04:00 — Caroline's new book
01:05:30 — Advice and the meaning of life
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, comedian Kyla Cobbler shares an honest, no-frills account of how her drinking quietly turned into dependency — while she was still training, working, and gigging five nights a week.
She tells Laura how being a regular performer in Barcelona blurred the lines between socialising and self-medicating, and how Dry January cracked the whole thing open. What started as a simple challenge ended in withdrawal, therapy, AA, and a completely new relationship with fear, nerves, and joy on stage.
🔑 Key PointsHow "high-functioning" drinking can hide a much bigger problemThe cycle of running, gigging, free drinks — and waking up groggy every single morningWhat withdrawal actually felt like by day two of Dry JanuaryWhy it was never about the red wine — it was about wanting to feel differentPerforming sober for the first time, and learning to feel everything instead of numbing it🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Barbara Scully sits down with Laura for a wide-ranging conversation that starts with her own recent run-in with the medical system and opens out into what it actually means to age as a woman in Ireland today.
Barbara talks about months of hip pain, a string of MRIs, a suspected stroke that turned out to be nothing, and the moment she decided to step off the treadmill of tests, hand back the prescription and rebuild her strength in the gym. She also shares her type 2 diabetes diagnosis in her mid-50s and the two years of remission she achieved through diet and exercise before her mother died and life became harder again.
The conversation moves into menopause, brain fog, mood swings and the language used about older women. Barbara reframes brain fog as an information retrieval slowdown, makes the case that women's anger after menopause is real and warranted, and argues that being underestimated as you get older is closer to a superpower than to invisibility.
There is also room for the story behind it all. Growing up tall in a male-dominated house. Becoming an unmarried mother in 1987 and listening to politicians and clergy describe women like her as a scourge on the radio. The close, unconventional friendship she had with her mother, who set up her own business teaching women word processing in the late 1980s. And the comedy career she fell into in her 60s, now touring with her one-woman show Older Bolder Wiser. Her best-selling book ‘Wise Up’ is available now in Irish bookstores nationwide & on Amazon.ie 📚
🔑 Key PointsTrusting your gut with healthcare
After months of MRIs and a hip replacement referral, Barbara declined the surgery and rebuilt her strength through physio and the gym.
A diabetes diagnosis as a wake-up call
A type 2 diagnosis in her mid-50s pushed her into healthier habits and into remission for two years.
Brain fog reframed
Women in their 60s have decades more information stored than younger people; what is labelled brain fog is information retrieval slowdown.
Anger after menopause is real
As life pressures lift, you have the headspace to notice ongoing inequalities, and that anger is not a hormonal mood swing.
Underestimated, not invisible
Being overlooked as an older woman gives you the element of surprise and the freedom to take risks without caring what people think.
The cost of conformity
A senior CEO told Barbara she would love to let her hair go grey but feared not being taken seriously at work.
Becoming an unmarried mother in 1987
Barbara remembers her father going upstairs to be sick, three weeks of silence, then a quiet "we'll stand by you" on a snowy morning.
A friendship with her mother
Her mother bought her her first baby cham at 12, set up her own business in her 50s and was a collaborator throughout Barbara's life.
📚 ResourcesWise Up — Barbara Scully
Memoir reflecting on the years after menopause.
Older Bolder Wiser
Barbara's one-woman comedy show currently touring Irish theatres.
Funny Women Ireland
Set up by Orla Doherty and Val Troy to promote women in comedy.
⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — Hip pain and the MRI run-around
03:00 — Stepping off the treadmill of tests
07:30 — Type 2 diabetes and remission
09:30 — Why brain fog is not what we are told
11:00 — Anger after menopause is real
13:00 — Underestimated rather than invisible
17:00 — Letting the hair go grey
22:00 — The freedom of getting older
28:00 — A first smear test in the 80s
36:00 — Growing up tall and the slow set
44:00 — Giving up red wine and finding gin
48:00 — Her mother as collaborator
56:00 — Losing her mother in 2022
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, GP and menopause specialist Dr Sarah Callaghan explains why perimenopause so rarely arrives with a bang — and why so many women spend years "muddling through" before they realise what's actually going on.
She tells Laura about the slow, sneaky creep of symptoms, the patterns she sees most often in clinic, and the women who mistake their perimenopause for postnatal anxiety, burnout, grief, or "just life". It's a powerful reframe: if something feels off, you deserve more than "just cope".
🔑 Key PointsWhy perimenopause symptoms rarely arrive all at once — and why that mattersThe fluctuating, "good week / bad week" pattern that makes women doubt themselvesCommon mislabels: postnatal anxiety, stress, grief, COVID, burnoutThe "I just don't feel like myself" phrase she hears in clinic over and overWhy you don't need to be in crisis to ask for help — even a 20–30% drop in functioning is worth investigating🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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Laura sits down with MEP Maria Walsh for a wide-ranging conversation about women, power and what is shifting in Europe right now. Maria has just returned from the UN Commission on the Status of Women in New York, where for the first time in seventy years member states could not agree a final text on access to justice for women.
She talks honestly about online misogyny, the deepfakes already circulating in Irish secondary schools, conversion therapy, and the website created about her during the 2019 election that is still live today. Alongside that, she opens up about internalised homophobia, the loneliness of political life, and growing up as the gay Rose of Tralee at a time when Ireland was shifting on marriage equality.
The conversation also moves through period poverty, FGM, the underfunding of women's healthcare, the pink tax, and what it would take to close the gap on cardiovascular care, menopause and reproductive health. It is a frank look at the work still ahead and the toll it takes on the women trying to do it.
🔑 Key PointsThe UN couldn't agree on access to justice for women — For the first time in seventy years the Commission on the Status of Women failed to find consensus, after the US tabled eight late amendments including the definition of a woman.
Deepfakes are already in Irish secondary schools — 99% of generated deepfakes are pornographic and 96% of victims are women and young girls, with nudification apps making explicit content from a single photo.
Online attacks follow women in politics
A website created during the 2019 election is still live, and Coco's Law catches those who share content but not those who build or host the apps.
Conversion therapy is still legal in most of the EU
Only eight EU countries have banned it, and Ireland's commitment sits inside the programme for government.
Women's healthcare is underfunded
More research funding has gone into male baldness than endometriosis, and there are only six menopause clinics across Ireland.
Cardiovascular care is still built around men
Heart attack symptoms are taught through male presentation, leaving women under-treated when it matters.
The pink tax keeps quietly costing women
Razors, dry cleaning and a 23% VAT rate on sunscreen all add up across a lifetime.
Politics takes a real personal toll
Maria speaks openly about loneliness, comfort eating, and learning to take up space in Brussels.
📚 ResourcesUN Commission on the Status of Women
Coco's Law
ILGA-Europe
Belong To
Women for Election
See Her Elected
Riley
Hope Foundation
Ruhama
Esker House
Her Last Search (Croí)
⏱️ Timestamps03:39 — Back from the UN Commission on the Status of Women
07:33 — Why the US tabled eight amendments at the eleventh hour
12:37 — Deepfakes, disinformation and the 90% statistic
15:04 — Conversion therapy and the EU debate
19:23 — The Burke website that is still live
27:38 — Deepfakes in Irish secondary schools
35:43 — What policy needs to do, and Ireland's chance to lead
40:53 — Cardiovascular care and Her Last Search
45:06 — Pink tax, menopause clinics and the funding gap
49:29 — Why women are still underrepresented in politics
53:01 — Period poverty, Riley and Any Time of the Month
58:25 — Loneliness and learning to take up space
59:30 — Calcutta, Hope Foundation and human trafficking
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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- Visa fler
