Avsnitt
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Charlottes from the community shares their story of lived experience with us, and we talk about the experience of learning about DID in academia.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We give a Now Time update - on everything.
NOTICE: The System Speak 501(c)3 was dissolved at the February 2025 Board meeting due to not having staff to track executive order changes impacting non-profits. Donations are no longer tax deductible. You can READ HERE from the National Council of Non-Profits about the impact of these changes, as well as the response from the Council. We look forward to future endeavors when things settle!
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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Saknas det avsnitt?
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We try to process one week post-election.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We give an update on therapy after sharing our symposium artwork in session.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We share about symposium recovery - and progress!
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We share some of what we learned at the McLean presentation at Harvard.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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Jon Cleveland shares with us about psychedelic research and HPPD.
Jon’s email: [email protected]
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ -
We read and respond to listener emails.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We talk with ISSTD clinician Valerie Sinason (UK) about "infantacidal attachment".
The "still face experiment" video on YouTube is HERE.
The poem we referenced, which we wrote in 2020:
In the last week,
I watched my 5 year-old daughter's butterflies be born.
They came home with us
for quarantine,
a gift of hope and peace
while she herself is dying,
while my children miss their friends
and watch their sister fade away.The caterpillars crawled
in the grime
as they learned to spin,
then hung themselves
from the top of the cup.I know the feeling.
The metaphor did not escape me,
this therapeutic process
of freeze
where transformation is required -
quarantined
in a glass house
hanging by a thread
nothing the same as it was.Before the chrysalis
there was a shedding of skin
I recognized as a shedding of me.For all I have learned the last four years
about integration,
I thought the debate was between
brownies
and fruit salad,
as if I would get to choose my last meal.But all of it was grime.
So I pretended to grow wings
while you locked me away.
I wrapped myself in dissociation
like a cocoon of worlds inside.I never invited you in here.
No one warned me how sticky it was.
I watched their backbone start to form
like scales
that fell away
like therapy
talking away.Therapy was taking away my dissociation
while I fought to lock myself in it.If you have any heart at all,
you want to reach out
to reach in
to touch
to help them free the hardened shell.But you cannot.
Because that wriggling work
is what makes them strong
is what sets them free
is what makes me
Me.And I know
how cold and lonely it is in there,
in here,
where I am,
where no one goes
no one sees
no one knows.You promise wings.
You promise freedom.
You promise flying free.But all I remember
is the grime.
And all I know
is the crawling through filth.
And all I see
is that I have hung myself here
vulnerably
to be stared at
and gawked at
and not touched
while I am frozen
and cold
and hanging here
not who I was
and not yet free.You say no parts left behind
or lost
or abandoned.But I see my shell laying there
where I once crawled.And these wings
still sticky
don't feel like mine.And I can't yet fly.
You flick at my net
to show me that I can
like a bird pushing its baby out of the nest
and it hurts me
betrays me
stings me
scares me.Except you don't push too hard
and I feel you wait
while I don't want to leave.I would rather hang myself
there
where being frozen
has always kept me safe.I am uncomfortable
with so many changes
and didn't know
I would come out
looking so different
than how I crawled in.I cling to the net
because you taught me how to be grounded.And I have always known
how to shelter-in-place.I can see the outside world
where everyone else lives,
but I don't at all like
you sending me away
to go live there.Because I do not know how to live.
I know how to crawl.
I know how to hang.It makes me angry at you
(even though I am not)
when you try to send me away
from the place where I hung
away from where my shadow still stays
away from where my shell lies.I don't know if you understand
that still feels like me
and the cocoon still feels safer
and the sun is still too bright for my eyes.I am drying out my wings
and saying goodbye
while you unzip my world
to shoo me out
so I can fly
because you say
I was meant for the sky.But all I remember
is the grime
and how to crawl.And I don't understand
why you don't understand
that I don't actually know how to fly.But what I do know
more than you know I know
is that there is no going back
and that I am relieved
to have the sticky washed off of me.(I know, I know.
You never said I had to leave.
But I can't stay here
looking at the shell of me.)Emma Sunshaw, May 2020
The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We share an update from therapy, about learning how memory time and now time connect through re-enactments… and start looking at Memory Time where the pain is.
Note: This therapy session happened three days after the last session where we did the four questions that helped me see how Memory Time invades Now Time. I thought I was going in to my therapy session to talk about the hard conversations in Now Time, and my therapist helped me see roots of where Memory Time invades - which ultimately was a bridge that leads directly to the disorganized attachment pieces we will share starting next week. Also, the song at the end of this episode was the LGBTQIA+ PRIDE theme last summer, because so many of us feel isolated from family and caregivers simply because of who we are. It was fun and peppy, hiding the big feelings in the lyrics - like a song in drag. I slowed it down and added the sad tone to emphasize congruence between music and lyrics. It is not meant to be literal.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ -
We explain attachment wounds.
The "still face experiment" video on YouTube is HERE.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We share how our therapist walked us through the “hidden agenda” of re-enactment that shows up as attachment drama in relationships.
Four Reflections:
1. Three positive relationship characteristics from relationships in my childhood
2. Three negative relationship characteristics from relationships in my childhood
3. Three things I needed most in childhood (from my caregivers) and did NOT get
4. Three "negative" feelings I experienced in childhood over and over and over again.
CLICK HERE for the weeping camel video.
The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ -
We read and respond to listener emails.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We explore how attachment wounds impact relationships.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ -
We get ourselves through a hard weekend.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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Jamie+ has a new book, You Lied to Me About God, that they want to talk about: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/760810/you-lied-to-me-about-god-by-jamie-marich-phd/
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ -
We share an update about the new school year, and acknowledge some wins and the feeling like a fresh start with a new year.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We share a therapy update after the family visits.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ -
You need to know about it. 99 cents.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
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We wrestle with acceptance of circumstances in our lives, only to find out it requires accepting ourself/ves.
The website is HERE.
You can join the Community HERE. Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups. Message us if we can help!
You can contact the podcast HERE.
Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general. Content descriptors are generally given in each episode. Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse. Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience. Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity. While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice. Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you. Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency. This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services.
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ - Visa fler