Avsnitt

  • In the last episode of the Poly Parents mini-series I spoke to Molly Roden Winter, author of the New York Times Bestseller More: A Memoir of Open Marriage. We spoke about her experience overcoming shame as a non-monogamous mother and how opening up her marriage helped her grow and learn about herself.

    Get Molly's book here!

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  • Today, I talk to writer and coach Sarah Stroh (Monogamish_me on Instagram), a week before giving birth. We speak of how becoming pregnant changed the dating game for her and put her identity as a flirty and adventurous person into question. She also tells us about what led her to decide to co-parent with a friend and how that influenced her partner.

    Connect with Sarah:

    Instagram

    Substack

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  • In the second part of my conversation with Melissa and Jay, we discuss their transition from being open to polyamory, partially due to their three kids leaving for college. They each share their unique methods of dealing with jealousy and other challenging emotions, as well as how they've adapted to these feelings. Finally, they talk about their experience of revealing their non-monogamous relationship to their children, and the unexpected outcomes that followed.

    Resources mentioned in this episode:

    Carol & David's Episode: Unlearning Monogamy

    ⁠Esther Perel's Questions to Build Adaptability⁠

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  • Melissa and Jay decided to open up their marriage after two decades together. Today, they share some of the challenges they faced during that transition, such as learning how much to share about their outside relationships with one another. They also tell us how they used Craiglist (believe it or not) to find a match for their first non-monogamous date. Lastly, they give great tips around finding community.

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  • Abbey and Liam are the voices behind Evolving Love Project, a platform that explores non-monogamy and conscious relationships through Abbey’s writing, their podcast, and conversation evenings and retreats in Australia.

    In our conversation they tell us how being non-monogamous has helped them reconnect with their independence and return to their family life feeling refreshed. They also reveal how their sexual relationship changed after having their son and what they did to bring back the spice and reconnect. Lastly, we speak of their experience coming out as non-monogamous parents in Australian television.

    Connect with them:

    evolvingloveproject.com

    Evolving Love Project IG

    Evolving Love Project Substack

    Resources mentioned in this episode:

    Book: Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel

    Jessica Fern's Books

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  • Chamberlin and Michael struggled a lot in their relationship, having periods of opening and closing, cheating and hurting each other and ultimately breaking up. About a month after they broke up, Chamberlin found out that she was pregnant. And for reasons we discuss in the podcast, this pregnancy completely shifted their relationship, for the best.

    Today we also talk about Michael’s process getting comfortable with having threesomes with other men. So if you are in a heterosexual partnership where you might want to bring a second man in, you might find some useful insights in here.

    At the end of the episode we also get an update from Mariah, my bestie and ex-cohost of Polycurious.

    Resources discussed in the episode:

    Powderful (wellness blend)

    Costume Closet Instagram + website

    Mariah Episode 1 (the Stigma of Non-monogamy)

    Mariah Episode 13 (Changing Partners)

    Mariah + Fer Episode 25 (Best Friends Open to Play)

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  • Today I chat with metamours JD and Lorena, as well as their common partner Aviva (a metamour is a partner’s partner.) Even though Aviva and Lorena were dating first, JD has become Aviva’s nesting partner. And today we chat about how even though that transition was a little difficult, Lorena was also very happy for Aviva and JD, someone she knew and really liked. I was left feeling warm from this conversation as I could really tell there is so much love and respect between the three of them. I hope that regardless of whether you are close with your metamours or not you can take them as an inspiration in your journey.

    Resources discussed in this episode:

    Aviva's IG and website where you can find her music ⁠Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy

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  • Today I speak to Sarah Tilley, Founder and CEO of Beautiful Space. Sarah is a psychedelic guide, integration specialist and couple therapist. Today she tells us about her work leveraging the power of psychedelics in relationships. We also talk about what couples might do to increase intimacy even without the use of these substances.

    If you are interested in my relationship coaching services reach out to ⁠[email protected]

    Resources discussed in this episode:

    Wonderland Conference ⁠Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy

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  • In this episode I talk about the 12 lessons I have learned in my Polycurious journey.

    Be Patient. Go as fast as the slowest person Find the right time to talk Check with your partner before making plans with other people Feeling guilt at first is normal Don’t sugarcoat. Be honest with your partner Determine how much you want to share with your partner Meeting your partner’s partners (metamours) helps with jealousy Jealousy and insecurities are likely to decrease with time You can’t control your feelings for other people Infatuation and New Relationship Energy can be fleeting Be careful where you invest your energy Non-sexual intimacy can be powerful

    Resources discussed in this episode:

    Fer & Seth’s episode Jessica’ Esfandiary's episode Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy Rachel Krantz episode Dr.Zhana's episode Mariah & Fer's episode Tory and Jackson's Monocurious episode

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  • Today I bring to you the second part of my conversation with Natasha + Jeremy, sex coaches and educators behind All The Feels. They give amazing tips around communication in and outside of the bedroom. Jeremy talks about ways that are sexy and respectful to approach women and they both share how to have a threesome that is fun and sexy and where everyone feels safe. We also talk about what one can do if you have a sexual desire or preference your partner doesn’t like.

    Resources discussed in the episode:

    Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power - Carolyn Elliott

    Untamed - Glennon Doyle

    Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead

    Pussy: A Reclamation - Regena Thomashuer

    Dr. Eva Cadell Certified Sex Coach

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  • Today I had a wonderful discussion with Natasha and Jeremy, the couple behind All The Feels. They are certified sex coaches, working on empowering people to have better sex lives. Besides coaching, they also educate through their instagram and their porn videos.

    Today we chat about their journeys taking charge of their sexuality and navigating non-mongamy. Natasha also tells us how she went from feeling jealousy to getting turned on when seeing Jeremy having sex with other women.

    Resources discussed in the episode:

    Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power - Carolyn Elliott

    Untamed - Glennon Doyle

    Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead

    Pussy: A Reclamation - Regena Thomashuer

    Dr. Eva Cadell Certified Sex Coach

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  • Today I speak to Jessica Esfandiary, the host of the Open Late podcast. She tells us how she opened up her now 9 year relationship only a few months in, after an ‘accidental’ threesome. We talk about how she went from hiding her open lifestyle even from her closest friends to having a podcast about non-monogamy. She also tells us the reasons why she likes being polyamorous, including seeing a side of herself she doesn’t always express with her partner.

    Resources discussed in the episode:

    ⁠The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures (book)⁠

    ⁠Relationship Style Quiz

    Listen to Open Late

    Spotify: Are You Polycurious with Fernanda from the Polycurious Podcast

    Apple Podcast: Are You Polycurious with Fernanda from the Polycurious Podcast

    Connect with Open Late on Instagram

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  • In the second part of our conversation with Jenny and Kris we chat about a time when Jenny fell in love with a secondary partner and had a hard time managing both relationships. Jenny also tells us about the parties she organizes and how it all began as a way to connect the non-monogamous community.

    Follow ⁠Space Invader Social Club⁠ on Instagram

    Get tickets to their event ⁠Purple Haze on 420⁠

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  • In today’s episode Mariah and I chat with Jenny and Kris, who have been together for almost a decade and navigated non-monogamy from the beginning. They tell us everything about their introduction to the non-monogamous world and what they learned in this process.

    Follow Space Invader Social Club on Instagram

    Get tickets to their event Purple Haze on 420

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  • Today I chat with Philip, the host of the podcast Dear Poly where I was a guest last year. We go deep into Philip’s coming out story and how he had to break so much stigma in his religious community to be his true self. If you have ever had a hard time letting go of shame, as a queer person, non-monogamous person or simply someone with a high sex drive, I think you will resonate with this episode.

    Dear Poly ⁠website

    Follow Dear Poly on ⁠Instagram⁠

    Listen to Fer's episode on Dear Poly on Spotify or Apple Podcasts

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  • Jess is a trauma centered relationship coach and plant medicine guide. Zach is a breath work facilitator and men’s intimacy coach. Together they have the Sacred Ships podcast, where I had the pleasure to be a guest last year.

    Today we talk about how they healed their sexual trauma, partly through their relationship. Zach opens up about using porn in a way affected his sexual performance, and reveals what he did to get to a comfortable place with his sexuality. Having casual sex with other women and opening up their relationship was actually an important part of this process.

    Connect to Sacred Ships through their website

    Follow Sacred Ships on Instagram

    Listen to Fer's episode on the Sacred Ships Podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts

    Resources mentioned in the episode:

    Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy (book)

    The Multi-Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know (book)

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  • In the first episode of our third season Mariah and I spoke to Taylor and Alan, who identify as solo poly and nonhierarchical. Both of them started their non-monogamous journey in high school and have since been immersed in the poly and sex-positive community.

    Today we talk about their experiences of seeing each other fall in love with other people and experiencing jealousy. They also share how polyamory has enriched their lives, allowing them to explore and learn from other people while maintaining their independence.

    You can follow Taylor on IG @velvetsuccubus

    You can follow Hacienda on IG @haciendacommunity

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  • In the last episode of Monocurious we interview Tory and Jackson, a couple living in at Lightning Society, a co-living residence and event space in Brooklyn. 

    Today Tory and Jackson give us a crash course on non-sexual intimacy. Tory tells us why she decided to remain single for most of her twenties, focusing on her independence and building intimate friendships. Jackson, on the other hand, fell into one monogamous relationship after the other, and often felt he lost himself in them. But meeting Tory helped him realize that they could maintain their independence by having their non-sexual needs met by a community of friends. Today’s conversation shows how solid and special their relationship is because they don’t rely completely on each other for all of their needs.

    The Monocurious miniseries explores the question: What does monogamy look like in the 21st century? Our relationship dynamics are shifting. Even for people choosing to remain exclusive, monogamy doesn’t look like it used to. Subscribe to the podcast to listen to 3 episodes where you’ll hear from people who are consciously choosing monogamy instead of blindly following convention.

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  • In today's episode, we discuss dating culture, the various contrasts in experience men and women have, as well as some hot tips on communicating expectations after a first date. Tory recently moved to NYC from San Francisco, for work and to find partnership with a Jewish woman. Ava, our Monocurious co-host, has lived & dated in NYC for 8+ years. Tory and Ava share how their family, culture, and their own experiences with open dynamics influenced their desire to be monogamous at this stage of their life. 

    The Monocurious miniseries explores the question: What does monogamy look like in the 21st century? Our relationship dynamics are shifting. Even for people choosing to remain exclusive, monogamy doesn’t look like it used to. Subscribe to the podcast to listen to 3 episodes where you’ll hear from people who are consciously choosing monogamy instead of blindly following convention.

    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/polycurious/message
  • Sue & Jon became exclusive not long after their first date and married exactly one year after they met. When we joined them late last year, they were just six weeks away from having a baby. Despite going down what might seem a very conventional path (getting married, buying a house, having a baby), they are welcoming and understanding of the alternative paths many of their friends have taken. In their own words, they are “a floating island of monogamy in a sea of fluidity." And although they remain monogamous, being in an open community inspired them to allow space for their independence and focus on building trust and communication. 

    The Monocurious miniseries explores the question: What does monogamy look like in the 21st century? Our relationship dynamics are shifting. Even for people choosing to remain exclusive, monogamy doesn’t look like it used to. Subscribe to the podcast to listen to 3 episodes where you’ll hear from people who are consciously choosing monogamy instead of blindly following convention.

    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/polycurious/message