Spelade
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What happens on a night out with David Beckham, hours after making your England debut? Peter Crouch reveals all and tells us how Sven tried to sooth himself after games. Find out how his international career came to an end and why ‘Michelle from the FA’ plays such an important role.
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Peter Crouch tells us what it’s like to be a player on the move on deadline day, arguments with chairmen and disagreements with managers. Plus, how players try and get one over on TV reporters and journalists.
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What goes on in a dressing room full of millionaire footballers? Peter Crouch tells Tom Fordyce and Chris Stark tales of which team-mate to avoid following into the toilet and why the kit man is the most important man at a football club.
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Is voicemail as a concept dead? Are Christmas cards actually an insult? Is launching fireworks out of an orifice ever acceptable? Somehow the boys manage a revelatory discussion on the role and tricks of football agents while also answering these and other unexpected questions.
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The art of tackling is one celebrated on these shores more than anywhere else, so how do Premier League stars perfect it? The boys analyse Crouchy’s ‘red mist’, discuss whether Paul Scholes deserved his reputation for bad tackling and the ‘Great Shinpad Debate’ rears its head again. There’s a tale involving rubber gloves, a mouse and some curtains plus speculation about Arsene Wenger in a Blackburn bush.
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Diving into the murky infinity pool that is footballers and their holidays, the boys make a remarkable discovery about Crouchy’s linguistic skills before uncovering unsettling rumours about David Moyes, Neil Diamond and Louis Saha’s penchant for mixed doubles. An extraordinary woman pulls off an extraordinary trick and a chance dip into Crouchy’s phone contacts reveals more than could possibly be expected.
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What makes a great leader of a sporting team? As they attempt to find the answers, the boys stumble into a world of punitive fines, tedious logistics and general outsourcing to Gary Neville. There are surprise appearances from football’s own Dre and a mysterious brown-noser known only as Parched, while the unveiling of a new pod-listeners’ standardised greeting raises significant logistical concerns.
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Delighted to be #backstronger, the boys gather to chew over Crouchy’s retirement from actual football, and discover his secret fish-buying obsession as well as the true meaning of a Double-Dyche.
Meanwhile a discussion on the meaning of smell gets dangerously out of hand, while Peter makes a rash promise involving Andy Murray’s knighthood. It's all the insight you've been missing, but with a lighter flavour.
