Spelade
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Today you and I are digging into three things you must accept about other people.
It took me years to understand these truths.
It sounds horrible, but I always wondered, “What’s wrong with people? Why don’t they change?”
I know you can relate. Because today I’m taking your questions about trying to change other people.
You’re frustrated by the fact that your spouse or partner won’t exercise more. You get angry seeing how much money your daughter wastes going out every weekend. You’re annoyed by how stubborn your parents have become the older they get.
Me too.
I’ve tried every tactic you can imagine to get other people to change. And recently I realized the true source of my frustration: It’s not them, it’s me.
I’m refusing to accept three things.
These things are hard to accept, and they’re true.
Once you hear them and you apply them to your life, your relationships will be way easier.
In addition to the three truths about other people, you’ll learn research that explains why it’s so hard to get other people to change. And like all episodes, this one is packed with tactical advice and takeaways that you can put to use immediately.
And, if you’re the one who’s busy making changes but your loved ones are not being supportive, I answer that question from a listener, too.
I feel compelled to answer your questions because so many of you are improving your life with the tools you’re learning on this podcast and your family is starting to get annoyed with you. That’s okay. It shows you’re making progress (but it doesn’t make it easy).
Hopefully today’s episode will.
Xo Mel
Key lessons:
3:12: 3 powerful truths you have to accept about people.
4:33: Rule #1 explained
6:02: How do you deal with people who don’t want to change?
9:00: Why some people can’t change.
12:42: I’m embarrassed to tell you this story.
19:49: Rule #2 explained
20:37: Rule #3 explained
21:44: My “6-month rule” for any complainer
32:03: What do when the people around you don’t support the changes you’re making
40:23: The science of “Myside bias” and what it says about human nature
For full show notes, go to melrobbins.com/podcast
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Line of Duty’s Adrian Dunbar narrates Obscene: The Dublin Scandal, a seven-part series about a bizarre moment in Irish history.
In the summer of 1982, two seemingly random killings occurred within the space of days, sparking Ireland’s biggest manhunt. The smartly-dressed suspect, Malcolm MacArthur, was eventually found hiding in the home of Ireland’s Attorney General.
His trial lasted seven minutes, and after spending 30 years behind bars, MacArthur can now be seen wandering the streets of Dublin.
Featuring contributions from award-winning Irish novelist Colm Toibin (Brooklyn), The Irish Times’ Fintan O’Toole, and veteran broadcaster Olivia O’Leary, this series revisits the political fallout that ensued, and tackles the many unanswered questions surrounding this case.
