Avsnitt
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I don't know what that word means, but i have a dicey story to tell. We talk sandwiches, faking cancer and an Aussie view of american politics. Plus, is 1 min 42 secs the ideal length of a tai episode???
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Those are the words spoken on this extended version of this ain’t Iowa volume 2.
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They say money makes the world go round, but I’d argue that’s only true until you run out of toilet paper. Nothing exposes the true state of your finances, preparedness, and social standing quite like the humble roll of two-ply.
Think about it. A person’s wealth isn’t about what’s in their bank account—it’s about what’s in their bathroom. Jeff Bezos could buy an entire country, but if he’s caught in a stall with nothing but a cardboard tube, he’s just another guy in trouble. And let’s not forget the great TP crisis of 2020, when society briefly collapsed because we all realized how fragile our supply chains—and our dignity—really were.
The TP Wealth Index
Forget net worth calculators. The real way to measure financial security is by how much toilet paper you have at any given moment. Let’s break it down:
1. The One-Roll Peasants
If you’re living roll to roll, you are in a constant state of anxiety. You take careful, measured squares, rationing like it’s the apocalypse (which, let’s be honest, it might as well be). This is financial instability in its purest form.
2. The 12-Pack Middle Class
You’ve achieved some level of security. You buy toilet paper in respectable bulk but still have moments of doubt. You check your stash before guests come over, knowing that running out would ruin your reputation.
3. The Costco Elite
Ah, the rich. The ones with an entire cupboard dedicated to toilet paper. These people don’t worry about recessions, pandemics, or unexpected guests. They buy in 48-roll packs, flexing their economic prowess every time they casually pull out a fresh roll without a second thought.
4. The Preppers (A.K.A. The Ultra-Wealthy)
These are the one-percenters of the TP world. Entire basements filled with Charmin. They don’t just survive disasters—they thrive in them. If civilization crumbles, these folks will become the new oligarchs, trading triple-ply for food and shelter.
Toilet Paper and Financial Planning
Savvy investors diversify their assets, but the truly wise hedge their bets with a rock-solid TP strategy. Inflation might hit your grocery bill, but a well-timed bulk purchase means you’ve locked in your price per wipe for months—perhaps even years. That’s the kind of economic foresight they don’t teach in business school.Conclusion: The True Mark of Success
At the end of the day, forget luxury cars, stocks, or real estate. If you want to know someone’s real financial health, peek under their sink. A person with a healthy TP reserve is a person who’s got their life together.
So next time you’re feeling financially insecure, don’t check your bank balance—check your bathroom. Because in a world of uncertainty, toilet paper is the only true currency that matters.
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Yup, more sandwich lists. Plus ass hair, superbowl bets and broads love true crime!
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I know, gross. Did you know CES had a sex wing? Fobes does! This is the wisdom that comes with being an elder statesman.
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BMo is flying solo, trying to decipher his latest million dollar idea, his new luxury ride and the only thing worse than a nazi. Plus, Motle Crue takes a page from the TAI handbook.
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It's the boy band you didn't know you needed. We talk inauguration, national championship football and the world's worst Jareds. Plus dining in a library and Tony's superbowl predictions. You didn't hear this from me, but time for a new intro song.
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Do you take this drumstick…
It's the first Spoon show of the year, and it's full of love, loss, and of course, magical body fluids. Should I say my vows as Spoony Kiper Jr?
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We're back from our darkness retreat!
We talk wrestling and Aaron Rodgers and which one is more fake. Fobes talks about his mooch-mas. 2025 Tony is already menace.
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Bmo is out here giving gold star advice to close out 2024. He talks about the Eagles at the Sphere, Kingman comedy and cloning Jamie Foxx. Plus Nate's latest scam and why you should always get a cart at the grocery store. Hey, you want an Under Siege dvd?
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Well I'm not about to feel my feelings!
Tony's gotta a hard out, so we cram in a conversation about Santa, strip club vs only fans and the best shows to watch high. Guys, i think she likes me for real.
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I'm just saying, he's breathtaking. Fobes gives the final word on the election, a slow mooch month, and quite frankly, too much vegas news. Plus Tony makes BMo a racing fan.
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It's definitely cool that The Beer Engine Podcast went out of their way to record content for their listeners around Thanksgiving. They have a history of engaging their audience with fun and quirky holiday-themed content, such as episodes featuring games related to Thanksgiving foods, beer discussions, and light-hearted banter about holiday traditions. For example, episodes like "Mashed Potato Time" and "Creamed Onions" from previous years brought festive cheer to their listeners by blending humor, games, and beer-related talk.
Their dedication to creating entertaining content, even during the holidays, highlights their commitment to connecting with their community. If you'd like to explore these episodes, you can check out their archives on their website or podcast platforms.
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This episode is ONLY for FANS. BMo tries to unpack the mysteries of polyamorie, old man concerts that do it right and and a shameful secret revealed. Who would have thought the old ass laptop was the problem all along.
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Listen, today is gonna be a lot. The big takeaway? Mesquite is a wild place!
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It's the only vote that matters!
Avoid election results and help us put a bow on taicon, including misshapen veggies, the importance of shoe horns and is St Louis the best food city in America?
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Let's face it, if he did you wouldn't be able to hear this episode. Spoon updates us on the Circa Millions contest, dueling over priced dinners, and Fobes reviews a bunch of shot he didn't have to pay for. Plus a mooch story for the ages!
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It's the #TAICON24 live show! We recap the weekend, explore the porn house and admit to SO many crimes. Everything's coming up BMo!
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It's our final show until Tony heads out and there's no MoFobes! You're welcome….
We get an update on the Circa Millions contest, and meets Spoon's new bride to be. Plus Tony's travel plans and what events are appropriate for the ladies. For Christ's sake, leave that dog alone!
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We have a finalized TAICon schedule! Plus Spoon fallout, and air tight Dave Grohl joke and a fucked up sports betting story. I wanna be your monkey wrench baby….
- Visa fler
