Avsnitt
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What is your sexual birthright and can you say, with 100% honesty, that you are able to fully embrace your sexual self without shame, embarrassment or fear?
That’s the topic of this week’s discussion with one of my oldest guests, Galen Fous, a sex therapist and educator.
During our conversation, we discussed the role of kink and the erotic in maintaining an active sex life, even with physical limitations. Galen encourages couples to have open and honest conversations about their desires and to explore the vast territory of pleasure beyond traditional friction sex. He also highlights the healing and empowering aspects of reclaiming one's sexuality.
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Takeaways
* Explore your authentic sexuality and embrace your sexual birthright.
* Engage in open and honest conversations with your partner about your desires and fantasies.
* Move beyond traditional friction sex and explore the vast territory of pleasure available to you.
* Reclaim your sexuality and heal any past wounds or traumas.
* Embrace the opportunity to deepen intimacy and connection with your partner through sexual exploration.
Sound Bites
* "I'm still having sex at least three times a week and I'm talking about sex that is in the range of three to five hours per session."
* "This is the great time of life. You know, this is your time to have the freedom to pursue what interests you and what excites you. And sex can certainly be a big part of that."
* "To be honest, it's a very complicated at this stage when we have decades of indoctrination and programming and beliefs and stories and judgments and experience painful experiences and all those things now have are a big, those are all tangled up with your authentic sexual expression."
Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Unique Perspective
03:12. Maintaining an Active Sex Life in Later Life
08:45. Embracing Freedom and Pursuing Sexual Pleasure
11:36. Untangling Beliefs and Programming
18:15. Moving Beyond Friction Sex
26:07. Exploring the Vast Territory of Pleasure
31:51. The Importance of Honesty and Courage
34:37Conclusion and Invitation for Further Conversations
Find Galen at : https://GalenFous.com
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
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When I was growing up, there was a cult-like therapy called EST (Erhard Seminars Training), which couples and singles could attend. I subsequently learned that it became Landmark Forum. I mention it because when I think of retreats, having never attended one, they always feel mysterious and somewhat secretive. Still, I know plenty of people who regularly go on retreats, and I know now how beneficial it can be to switch off from the world for several days and absorb whatever knowledge is being imparted.
Kanya Ford, my guest on this week’s podcast, hosts a couples retreat called Fools in Love Couples Retreat. Here, couples can take a break from their usual environment and address relationship issues. The retreat includes purposeful activities, community meals, and opportunities for couples to support and learn from each other. Each year, she introduces new elements to keep the sessions fresh and interesting.
The retreat lasts from Thursday or Friday to Sunday afternoon. As she explains during our conversations, emotions can run high during the retreat, with happy tears, sad tears, and frustration. The motivation for attending the retreat varies, from reigniting sexual passion to seeking help before marriage. The retreat is open to a diverse mix of people, and the average age of attendees is between 35 and 45. What particularly fascinated me about her retreat is that she tends to keep them below ten people so each couple is able to spend quality time with Kanya and the other participants, as well as with each other.
In addition to the retreat, Kanya offers one-on-one coaching and group classes called Mind Phucked (I love this!), which focus on utilising the mind to set the body free in relationships. These classes include touch yoga, pleasure mapping, and deep stretch exercises. Kanya emphasises the importance of maintaining intimacy and connection in relationships, especially in the senior years.
00:00 Introduction to the Fools in Love Couples Retreat
01:24 Digging into Relationship Nuances at the Retreat
04:06 Addressing Emotions and Apologies at the Retreat
05:13 Motivations for Attending the Retreat
15:13 Utilising the Mind in Group Classes
You can find Kanya at:
https://loveandintimacy101.com/
https://www.instagram.com/coachkay101
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
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Saknas det avsnitt?
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In this episode, I have the pleasure of chatting with Denise Renye, who is a sexologist, sex therapist, yoga therapist, and psychedelic therapist. We dive into the fascinating role of psychedelics in the lives of older adults and how they can enhance intimacy and help manage pain. Denise shares her insights on being a psychedelic therapist and how she guides individuals in integrating their experiences into everyday life.
We also discuss the importance of communication in relationships and how psychedelics can open up new avenues for exploring desires, boosting both emotional and physical connections. It’s a heartfelt conversation that underscores the need for greater awareness and access to professionals in the field of sex therapy. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
Chapters
00:00 Introduction to Denise Renye and her multiple titles
03:21 Integration of psychedelic experiences
06:18 Enhancing relationships through psychedelics
12:43 Breaking down boundaries in relationships
19:28 Using sensual activities to enhance intimacy
25:54 The importance of sensate focus technique
32:00 The need for awareness and access to sex therapy professionals
Dr. Denise Renye
Licensed Psychologist* Certified Sexologist * Psychedelic Assisted Therapy and Integration * Certified Yoga Therapist
https://WholePersonIntegration.com
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Darlaine Honey is a Sexual Health Advisor working with Berkshire Healthcare and lives in Surrey, South of England. Having been diagnosed with lobular breast cancer, she is also an advocate for Breast Cancer Now on the workflow task force plus Breast Cancer Now / Ann Summers/My ViV collaboration for sex after breast cancer.
During the COVID lockdown, Darlaine and some friends formed the charity Lobular Breast Cancer so that other women could learn more about it.
As is evident from our discussion and from previous discussions I’ve had with those working in the area of sexual health, both in the UK and in the US, there’s not enough being done to support older people to have a healthier and happier sex life.
There’s an assumption that sexual health advisors are there to support younger people. At the same time, the stats reveal that more older people are presenting with STDs than ever before, thanks to escalating divorce rates and the opportunity through dating apps and elsewhere for sexual encounters.
I also learned, towards the end of our conversation, of the impact of drugs used to treat breast cancer on women’s sexual health and was shocked to discover how they may contribute to vaginal atrophy and a significant decline in libido and sensitivity, none of which patients are commonly told when undergoing treatment.
My friend Sam Evans, who runs a sex toy shop called Jo Divine, has spoken via her social media channels about ‘medical misogyny’ and, in talking with Darlaine, it’s clear how much more needs to be done to ensure women receive the information we all deserve to make educated decisions about our overall wellbeing which includes our sexual health.
If you’d like to learn more about Darlaine’s work, you can reach her on LinkedIn.
Show your support for Lobular Breast Cancer here:
https://lobularbreastcancer.org.uk/darlaine-honey/
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. Paid subscribers support my ongoing work to help older people have a healthier, happier sex life and receive an additional subscriber-only post per week.
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Gigi Raven Wilbur is an American bisexual rights activist and writer. They have a bachelor's degree in philosophy and a master's degree in social work.
I suspect 50 Shades of Grey has contributed to confusion around what BDSM entails and how it can be used to enhance one’s intimate life. I recall upon reading it and all the publicity that ensued upon its publication that there was outrage from those within the BDSM community that their lifestyle choice should be portrayed so inaccurately. Even my kids who knew I dabbled in this world said at the time, “You should go on TV and tell them it’s not like this!”
The fact is that BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism) has many benefits as Gigi and I discuss during this podcast. It can enhance one’s intimate relationships by enabling conversations that touch on consent, power dynamics, pain and sometimes how this may relate to earlier trauma. It can, without any penetration being involved, transport its participants to altered states of consciousness, sometimes called sub-space. And it can be playful, imaginative and fun. In my experience, people I’ve met in the lifestyle are some of the most open and considerate people I know, for whom consent is paramount and pleasure is key.
Gigi is also deeply involved with the BDSM world. Today, she advocates for the healing, cathartic, and spiritual power of BDSM as founder and Sacred Harlot of Aphrodite’s Temple. This modern-day sex temple provides sex-positive education and a sex-positive sacred play space for adults. Gigi’s book is called The Dominant’s Handbook: an Intimate Guide to BDSM Play. Gigi wrote the essay Walking in Shadows: Third Gender and Spirituality about her intersex identity.
If you’re interested in exploring this further, check out these links:
The BDSM Interest Evaluation - https://www.ravenslairleather.com/free-offers
The Dominant’s Handbook - An Intimate Guide to BDSM -https://www.ravenslairleather.com/ravenslairbooks
Adult Bedtime Stories - https://rss.com/podcasts/adult-bedtime-stories/
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A friend suggested that I celebrate Episode 100 of this podcast by reuniting my former co-hosts, Peter Marriott and Zoe Kors. Since Peter and I started recording the podcast in June, much has changed - some of it good and some not-so-good.
For a start, Peter moved to Sheffield, where he had been a lecturer at the University for many years. He is rekindling old friendships, making lots of new ones, and dabbling in the local kink scene.
Zoe, meanwhile, is on the verge of launching a new course, Practical Intimacy for Couples, is writing her memoir (!), and, from the sound of it, has a full roster of clients.
I’m also juggling the increasing demands of hosting this podcast alongside my new role as UK Sales & Marketing Director for Firmtech, singing and co-facilitating Startup School for Seniors.
I hope you enjoy this particular episode. And if you appreciate the work we all have put in, please consider becoming a paid subscriber, which will help contribute to the running costs while helping to enhance and support the sex lives of older people. :)
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
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I met Mo in Las Palmas six months ago when she told me about her desire to open a co-working space there. Well, it opened two weeks ago! So, I decided to take the opportunity to talk to her about her dating life while on a six-day trip there.
Although there’s more than a 10-year age gap between us, we share our frustration and the problems that come with trying to find a partner using an app. As someone who has tried various apps over the years, I've become increasingly frustrated with the superficial and ineffective nature of online dating. It seems I’m not alone, as multiple articles have been published recently about their ineffectiveness.
While Mo comes from the ‘Hot or Not’ days, and my history dates back to a very early dating site/erotic magazine called Nerve, we have noticed how swiping reduces people to their physical attributes and tries to ‘gamify’ the whole experience. The matching algorithms feel so shallow as if they're more focused on looks than actual compatibility.
Another major problem is the lack of meaningful communication. It's become so common for people to simply "ghost"—disappear without any explanation. This is incredibly disheartening and makes the whole dating process feel like a draining chore rather than an opportunity to find a genuine connection.
Mo and I agree that in-person interaction is so important in dating. There's an energy and chemistry that can't be captured on a screen.
This episode gets at the heart of our frustrations with modern dating. I hope it encourages listeners to approach finding a partner in a more holistic and authentic way rather than relying solely on these flawed dating apps. The right connection is out there; we just have to be willing to try to find it!
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I met Leora Lightwoman by chance at the launch party for Monique Roffey's new book, Passiontide, which I highly recommend as a great summer read. Leora's name had come up over the years within the tantra community, so I was delighted when she booked to come on the show and talk about her work. Softly spoken, Leora exudes calmness, which explains why she is highly sought after by those who want to deepen their intimacy and connection with their partner.
Tantra has had a negative reputation over the years, and I know from speaking to many "tantric practitioners" that its definition can vary greatly from person to person. As someone who has explored this practice and enjoyed techniques I've read about in the classic "The Art of Sexual Ecstasy" by Margot Anand and learned from practitioners such as Jahnet Delight, I was pleased to learn that Leora had studied with Anand, which suggested we would be on the same page discussing tantra.
During our conversation, Leora delves into practical tips for using tantra, easy exercises for beginners, and what couples can expect when they come to her for relationship counselling.
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported weekly newsletter. If you believe that maintaining a healthy and happy sex life in later years is important, and you want more people to feel confident about exploring sexual pleasure as they age, consider becoming a subscriber.
Buy Leora’s Book, Tantra: The Path to Blissful Sex, here.
You can find Leora here:
https://diamondlighttantra.com/
https://www.facebook.com/DiamondLightTantra
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I love to learn what motivates those working in sex education and as sex therapists/sexologists to choose this career path. For Austin Cresap, who works as a sex educator and sex therapist in Seattle, Washington, it was through numerous conversations with her grandma, now in her eighties.
Since training, she has become her grandma’s go-to person for discussing her intimate life, and Austin has, in turn, focused on the older generation as an aspect of her work.
There’s no cut-off date when it comes to learning about sex and intimacy. However, there is a shortage of information and interest from doctors in how to navigate one’s sex life when older, especially when it comes to people who may live with chronic pain or have a chronic illness. And it’s people such as Austin who can advocate for those who shy away from having uncomfortable conversations with medical professionals.
As Austin and I acknowledge, so many messages exist about what is or isn’t acceptable to do in later life. The more we can smash those taboos, reframe what older life can look like and embrace who we are, warts and all, the more we can continue to enjoy sex in a way that feels good for us.
You can find Austin at her website: www.icameheretotalktherapy.com
Instagram/TikTok: @icameheretotalk
You can find the accessible sex toy Austin recommends here: https://www.pushmobility.com.au/products/luddi-ziggy
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The stats for the percentage of men with erectile dysfunction are pretty staggering:
Approximately 41.5% of men in the UK reported experiencing ED, according to a 2018 study conducted by Viatris, Queen's University Belfast, and Pfizer. And it only increases with age:
- Around 29.3% for men aged 18-39
- About 45.6% of men aged 40 and over
According to research by the British Association of Urological Surgeons, 50-55% of British men between 40 and 70 years old have some degree of ED.
Ken Schafer can count himself as one of those men who also struggled with ED, and, like many men, he went straight for Viagra to cure his problem. After some time, that failed to work, so he started to look for other solutions. His journey led him to write a book, ‘A Practical Guide to Managing Erectile Dysfunction’ and to help now men like himself struggling with ED. In particular, he signposts his clients to specific practitioners who can support them in becoming more fit and healthy and, as a result, remove the requirement for pharmaceuticals and other medical interventions.
I found Ken’s honesty and willingness to be vulnerable about this particular challenge with ED very refreshing. And if you have a title for his job, please share it with me!
Web:
https://www.healthysexualitywithken.com/
Social media:
https://www.instagram.com/healthys3xualitywithken/https://www.tiktok.com/@healthys3xualitywithkenhttps://www.youtube.com/@HealthySexualityWithKenLLChttps://www.facebook.com/healthys3xualitywithkenllchttps://twitter.com/HSWKen
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Dr Marcy Brink is an intimacy and relationship coach who is here to challenge the traditional "relationship escalator" and explore alternative paths to connection and fulfilment.
Many of us have already lived the life outlined by societal norms - the expected progression of dating, exclusivity, marriage, and children. Relationship counsellors call this the ‘relationship escalator.’
But as we grow older, we may begin to wonder, "What else is possible?" Dr. Brink's clients have expressed a desire for more flexibility and autonomy in their relationships. They want to enjoy sexual and romantic connections without the pressure of traditional commitments like marriage or cohabitation.
Younger generations are already paving the way, freely exploring alternative sexualities and designing new models of intimacy. Embracing meaningful connections with play partners, dating across age differences, and trying consensual non-monogamy are just a few examples of the innovative ways people are redefining intimacy.
During our conversation, we discussed how social norms have shaped our dating and sex lives and how we can begin to think deeply about our authentic needs and desires. The goal is to empower us to communicate these needs openly with potential partners so we can all experience more pleasure and fulfilment in our later lives.
Join us as we rethink the relationship escalator and discover the vast possibilities for creating the intimate connections we genuinely crave.
https://www.instagram.com/marcy.brink/
https://www.facebook.com/sexandintimacy/
http://linkedin.com/in/marcy-brink-phd-sexandintimacy
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This week’s episode is all about the benefits of slow sex. I’ve been giving this a lot of thought recently, especially after my exquisite massage with Colin Richards, in which I was lucky enough to experience nearly two hours of undivided time completely devoted to my pleasure. After that experience, I immediately went out and bought a feather implement and a back scratcher that I wanted to try out with a lover as a part of a slow sex/massage session.
One of the benefits of being an older person is reconsidering what intimacy can be without the desperate urgency that we may have felt when we were younger to get to the ‘finish line.’ Whether we’re talking about solo pleasure or with a partner, we can take our time and, in doing so, let the experience take us wherever we want it to go.
Amara Charles has three decades of experience as an intimacy coach. In this episode, she shared practical tips for reigniting your sex life and relationships and “becoming the happiest, most fulfilled version of yourself without sacrificing anything.”
If your love life has gone a bit stale, or you’re in an intimacy rut, have a listen. Amara is very generously offering a gift of a 45-minute session for anyone who would like to consider working with her. Details below.
Amara Charles Gift
A Complimentary 45 Min. Intimacy Breakthrough Session
On this call, she will listen to your unique situation, find out what’s missing, and we'll create a plan to achieve what you want.
www.amaracharleslove.com/apply
Intimacy Retreats, Coaching and Sexuality Education
www.Amaracharles.com
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Today's podcast episode came about from a conversation I recorded with Paul Telford, the CEO of Emotional Bliss, a company focused on sexual pleasure. Paul has made it his mission to support older women in attaining sexual satisfaction. I was introduced to Paul by another guest, Kelly Connell, who suggested we discuss Paul's interest in how orgasms can help alleviate menopause symptoms. While I don't completely dismiss this idea, I believe that anything that feels good raises dopamine levels and enhances physical connection with a partner benefits both physical and mental health.
Originally from Yorkshire, Paul may not be the person you would immediately associate with someone who cares about women's sexual health. However, his perspective changed after a conversation with a sex therapist.
According to Paul, "During that encounter, I discovered that a significantly higher number of women rely on antidepressants compared to men. This is because men self-medicate throughout their lives, and it's even encouraged, while most women do not."
Paul began collaborating with leading sex therapists, as well as mechanical and electrical engineers. This collaboration led to the creation of Emotional Bliss, which developed prototypes of intimate massagers for women. After extensive work to find the best shapes, contact areas, textures, and vibrations, they received feedback and now offer a range of products with innovative features. These include incorporating heat and specific low vibrations that are ideal for targeting the larger clitoral nerves.
I hope you’ll enjoy this episode, and if you’d like to win an Emotional Bliss Intimate Massager, we have two to give away. All you have to do is refer your friends to this newsletter. The one who generates the most sign-ups by 30th June will win a vibrator.
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
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In this week’s episode, I interview Erika Shershun, a licensed therapist specialising in working with sexual trauma survivors, the author of the Healing Sexual Trauma Workbook and facilitator of the PESI Sexual Trauma Clinical Training.
Erika has counselled numerous older people who have had symptoms worsen later in life and is now seeking healing for sexual trauma from years earlier. Often, they’ve been in therapy prior but didn’t get the results they were looking for.
There is no expiry date when it comes to learning how to heal from any form of sexual trauma that may have taken place when a child, a teenager or in adulthood. And, as I’ve heard from specialists working in this area, the more we work through issues from our past, the more likely we will have a fulfilling relationship in the future.
Erika, herself a survivor of sexual trauma, talks about her own healing journey and about how she goes about helping others to “reclaim the life they were meant to live.” She is based in California.
Erika Shershun, MA, LMFT (she/her) Author of the Healing Sexual Trauma Workbook PESI Sexual Trauma Clinical TrainingHealing Sexual Trauma Journey ErikaShershunTherapy.com | HealingSexualTrauma.com
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Welcome to Episode 90! It's wonderful to have you here. What started back in 2022 as a bit of a lark with Peter Marriott (who now edits every episode) has turned into a chart-topping podcast, featured in The Guardian, The Telegraph, and multiple women's magazines. Along the way, I've learned more about sex than I thought possible, interviewed amazing experts from all walks of life, and hopefully opened your mind to deepening your own intimacy, whether with yourself or a partner.
This week, I'm in conversation with Colin Richards, whom I first heard about through a friend who had trained with him in sensual massage and spoke highly of him. Colin is well-known in the media, having helped over 8,000 clients since he started his practice back in 2005, to improve their sexual confidence and "gain a broader understanding of their partner's and others' sexuality to enhance their personal and intimate lifestyles."
During our discussion, we explore how intimate massage can be a gateway to understanding one's own erogenous zones and how, by allowing oneself to be pleasured by another with no need for reciprocation, we can experience the sexual pleasure we all deserve. I'm a firm believer that finding one's way to a happy, healthy sex life can happen at any stage of life, and intimate massage can be one way to understand one's own body. I'm looking forward to experiencing one of Colin's divine massages firsthand in a couple of weeks and will report back to paid subscribers.
Speaking of which, many thanks to those of you who have taken up a paid subscription. I truly appreciate it, and I have a backlog of toy reviews to catch up on, which you can look forward to if you're one of those who have chosen to pay £4.99/month. I'll also be sharing details of my holiday in Cap d'Agde, the world's largest naturist village, where I'm currently enjoying a break for a few days. It's a whole lot of fun here!
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Paid subscribers receive additional posts and discounts from trusted suppliers.
You can find Colin Richards at:
Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/Intimacymatters
Twitter; https://twitter.com/IntimacyMatters
Website: https://www.intimacymatters.co.uk
Colin is a member of The Association of Somatic & Integrative Sexologists
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This week, I had the privilege of speaking with Dr. Rebbeca Lahann, a licensed psychotherapist since the late 1990s who has recently become a certified sex therapist. Her resume is impressively extensive.
Dr. Lahann has delivered many keynote addresses, and our conversation previews her upcoming talk, "Are Your Client's Sexual Values Aligned, or in a 69?", which she will present at the AASECT 2024 Annual Conference in St. Louis, Missouri, on June 12.
As we discussed, personal values serve as a compass that guides our lives and helps us understand and appreciate our self-development. However, when it comes to our sexual values, they may not always be aligned. How many of us, for example, would value honesty but feel reluctant to be completely transparent with our sexual partners?
Alternatively, if our first experiences of sex were non-consensual or shaped by the lens of pornography, how much does this create conflict or misalignment between our sexual values and our personal values? If that is the case, what do we need to do to help align our sexual values with our personal values?
It’s a weighty and multi-layered subject and one I certainly had not considered before.
You can find more information about Dr Lahann on her website here.
https://linktr.ee/DrRebbecaLahann
.
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This week's podcast discusses how relationships can recover after one person has had an affair. It also explores how one's upbringing can contribute to the ability to have a healthy, loving relationship.
Thomas Gagliano speaks with authority as a person who has battled his own demons and, as an addict in recovery, discusses how family dynamics can lead to a less-than-ideal foundation for building a strong relationship.
Gagliano focuses on helping individuals and families navigate difficult situations and relationships through empathy, understanding, and personal growth in his professional practice.
Working with men in groups, couples, and individuals, he guides his clients to understand how to have uncomfortable conversations, unlearn behaviors that no longer serve them well, and repair relationships that may have come apart.
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Thomas Gagliano is the author of The Problem Was Me”
IG: @theproblemwasme
FB: Thomas Gagliano
FB: TheProblemwasme
Youtube: Thomas Gagliano
Twitter: @ThomasGagliano
Website – Theproblemwasme.com
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Firstly, I want to warmly welcome all my new subscribers. Thanks to a recent article in The Guardian about sex among individuals over 50, many of you have joined. I'm glad to have you here, and I encourage you to explore the previous episodes of my podcast. They cover a wide range of topics, including exploring tantra in later life, discussing kinks, various sexual health dysfunctions, online dating, and much more.
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
This week's podcast features a fascinating conversation with Tiffany Zahara. Tiffany specialises in assisting businesses that face censorship due to societal stigmas and government regulations. She provides comprehensive support to help these businesses focus on their areas of expertise and maximise their impact on the world.
In addition to her professional work, Tiffany has personal experience as a sex worker. She writes and speaks about the importance of normalising conversations around controversial topics such as intimacy and pleasure, which are often subjected to stigma, shame, and censorship.
During our conversation, we delved into the practical aspects of sex work, its role in maintaining long-term relationships, what typically happens during a session, and where to find workers who cater to specific preferences. We also discussed the significance of decriminalization and the need to protect the rights of sex workers.
You can find more information about Tiffany here.
I encourage you to subscribe and share this post/podcast, which I have created to help more older people to have a happy and healthier sex life. If you know of someone who would make a great guest or would like to nominate yourself, let me know. I have also opened up the chat function for paid subscribers whom are free to ask questions.
Subscribing costs a very reasonable £4.99 per month or £49.99 per year and goes towards the various costs I incur as a result of doing this such as hosting, recording software, social media tools. I welcome your contribution.
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This week, I had a lot of fun exploring with Ralph the concept of kinkiness and how older individuals can embrace their kinkier side later in life.
Ralph is a multi-talented professional who works as a writer and musician in both mainstream and adult content industries. He is the co-host of the "Licking Non-Vanilla" podcast, an anthologist, editor, columnist, blogger, produced playwright, adult scene scriptwriter, toy reviewer, SEO web writer, kink convention teacher, press agent, and interviewer. Needless to say, he possesses extensive knowledge about kink.
Sex Advice for Seniors is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Speaking from my personal experience, as someone who discovered kink in my forties, I may be a bit biased, but I believe it is one of the most inclusive lifestyles I have encountered. When I delved into the world of BDSM, for example, I noticed that people of all ages and abilities were present. It was within the kink community that I began to comprehend the relationship between pain and pleasure, the role of role-playing and fantasies in safely exploring forbidden topics, and how to establish deeper connections with partners beyond traditional sexual intercourse.
Ralph is entertaining, and you’ll love listening to him.
If you want to hear more from Ralph, check out his podcast, Licking Non-Vanilla, here.
I like Ralph's six-part series on Love, Sex & Kink here.
If you’d like to book a 1:2:1 coaching session with me, click the link below. If you’re seeking the voice of experience over academic qualifications related to all things sexual, I’m your gal. Discretion assured.
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You're never too old to engage in sexual activity, although in a care home setting, it may seem otherwise due to staff often neglecting the need for intimacy in later life.
In this episode, I interview Kelly Connell, a sex educator who has worked in various settings, including retirement communities and community centers for older individuals. It is fascinating to hear her perspective on the challenges she encounters in her work and the types of questions that older people ask her about sex and dating, which highlights the lack of available information.
The main focus of this podcast has always been to support older people in having satisfying sexual experiences, based on their own preferences. It is important to acknowledge that sexual activity can continue until the end of our lives, if desired.
However, my conversation with Kelly clearly indicates that there is still much work to be done to ensure that older people, particularly those in care home settings, are not deprived of their sexual autonomy, and that their relatives and staff are there to offer support.
www.kellyconnellconsulting.com
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