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  • We're diving into the intersection of body liberation, white supremacy, and dating with the incredible Jessica Wilson, MS. RD. As the author of "It's Always Been Ours: Rewriting the Story of Black Women's Bodies," Jessica brings her expertise as a dietitian, storyteller, and community organizer to the forefront. Together, Lily and Jessica explore the interplay between shrinking our bodies in response to white supremacy and shrinking our desires, unpacking how Black and Brown women can reclaim their body liberation and prioritize care in the dating world.

    We get into:

    The interplay between shrinking our bodies in response to white supremacy and shrinking our desires Jessica’s view on how Black and Brown women can reclaim their body liberation and prioritize care in the process of putting themselves out there in dating “Your body is not the problem,” Spaces to seek out body liberation support and community How do we set boundaries for those, not on the same page or path with body liberation? Jessica’s favorite moment of Black Joy since writing her book

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Jessica’s website

    Jessica’s book, It’s Always Been Ours

    Show notes:

    http://datebrazen.com/blog/body-liberation-dating-and-black-joy-with-jessica-wilson

  • Trigger warning: This episode contains mentions of suicide.

    You are worthy. If you need more convincing, this week’s episode is not to miss. Tara Schuster, author of Glow in the F*cking Dark: Simple Practices to Heal Your Soul from Someone Who Learned the Hard Way, joins Lily on the show! In the book and throughout this conversation, Tara shares practical steps to liberate yourself from emotional suffering, heal your past, and own your future.

    Tara served as Vice President of Talent and Development at Comedy Central, where she was the executive in charge of critically acclaimed shows such as the Emmy and Peabody Award–winning Key & Peele, the Emmy® Award winning @Midnight (now After Midnight on CBS) amongst many others. Over the last twelve years, Tara has spent her “10,000 hours” on the other side of the couch studying philosophy, therapies, religions, and even memoirs of the adults she admired so that she could find emotional freedom from a neglectful and psychologically abusive childhood.

    Lily and Tara get into:

    “It’s not magic having a different life. You can’t sit back and wait for it to happen; you have to work for it.” What inspired Tara to write Glow in the F*cking Dark and its mission: the practice of finding your essential self. Thoughts and advice for overcoming lack of self-trust and self-criticism Tara shares her self-compassion party trick! How Tara got to a place to make decisions rooted in her own best interest, especially in dating

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Get Instant Access to Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    Glow in the F*cking Dark, Tara Schuster

    Tara’s website

    Tara on Instagram

    The Loveland Foundation

    Show notes:

    http://datebrazen.com/blog/glow-in-the-dark-with-tara-schuster

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  • Are you tired of swiping left and right, endlessly scrolling through dating apps, hoping to find a genuine connection? In this episode, Lily welcomes Maxine Simone Williams, the creative powerhouse behind a New York City-based initiative, We Met IRL, reshaping how people meet and mingle, diving deep into the world of speed dating and real-life encounters.

    Maxine shares her journey of building We Met IRL and why her speed dating events make dating fun again. Plus, Lily and Maxine tackle common dating concerns like handling rejection at speed dating events or overcoming social barriers for the shy and introverted.

    Tune into this episode as Lily and Maxine journey beyond the screens, where in-person connections thrive.

    They get into:

    Dating assumptions that these events challenge - making dating fun again!

    Are dating apps the only way people are meeting people?

    Instagram vs Phone Number: what to give out when meeting IRL

    What if nobody chooses me at speed dating

    How to go about meeting people in real life or speed-dating if you are shy or introverted

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Get Instant Access to Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    We Met IRL on TikTok @wemetirl

    We Met IRL on Instagram @wemetirl

    Show notes:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/speed-dating-with-maxine-simone-williams

  • Are you striving to let go of the wrong people? What if we told you that the extent to which you're willing to bless and release the wrong people is directly linked to your path toward the right relationship? In this episode, Lily reveals her strategy for blessing and releasing the wrong people in your life, enabling your mind to shift its focus towards the right connections for you.

    "Blessing and releasing" is a radical step towards fulfilling your desires. So, grab your note-taking tools because this episode is full of practical how-to's on this transformative process.

    In this episode, you will learn:

    Having people in your life who are not suitable for you is about the underlying fear that what you want is not possible or not worthy of what you want. That is worthy of your curiosity and compassion.

    Categories of when to bless and release (B&R) someone

    Different levels of connection deserve a different approach to blessing and releasing.

    Tips for outlining a B&R moment for a breakup

    Lily breaks down an incomplete roster of individuals to bless and release, including: the stonewaller, the Eeyore, the most intense human, and the pen-pal.

    Reflection questions to help you determine if you need to bless and release someone

    Text and out loud scripts for B&R like “Hey, thanks for hanging. I’m not feeling a romantic connection, wish you the best.”

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    124. The “Thank You, More, Please!” Challenge!

    Radical Alignment, Alexandra Jamieson and Bob Gower

    Show notes:

    http://datebrazen.com/blog/how-to-bless-and-release-the-wrong-people

  • Today, get ready to geek out with us on the podcast! We're thrilled to have Faith Hill, a staff writer at The Atlantic, joining Lily for an insightful conversation about research and its cultural impact on dating. We get into topics like dating dynamics, dating yourself, social connections, and being single.

    Together, Lily and Faith dive into Faith’s latest articles about exploring love, dating, and the complexities of singlehood. What's particularly captivating about Faith's writing is how she addresses those burning questions that naturally arise as you delve into the research she shares.

    Tune in for a chat that sheds light on the intriguing intersection where love, society, and human connections meet! 🎙️✨

    We get into:

    Dating culture and its problematic value of coupled people over singles

    What the research showed regarding dating “spark vs. slow burn.”

    The assumption that we'll be happier in a relationship

    The emotions that get stirred up when examining this statement, “As your friends get coupled, it could feel like a ghost town.”

    Hot-take: “Spending all your time with your partner is not great for your relationship or friendships.”

    Allowing for messy intimacy with friendships or partners

    Perception and feelings about solo dating: how to release the narrative that taking yourself on a date means you are lonely, and how to bring more pleasure to solo time

    Hot-take: “Solitude is not antithetical to connection.”

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!


    130. How to find and create "exhale" friendships with Blake Blankenbecler


    173. Fighting for our friendships with Danielle Bayard Jackson

    Faith’s articles referenced in this episode:

    No, You Shouldn’t ‘Date ’Em ’Til You Hate ’Em’
    https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2023/11/awkward-modern-dating-the-spark/676039/

    Don't let love take over your life
    https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2023/09/relationship-balance-love-friendship-autonomy/675321/

    Take yourself on a date!
    https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/12/seeing-movies-alone-solo-date-in-public/672363/

    Show notes:

    http://datebrazen.com/blog/research-cultural-impact-of-dating

  • Doors to this round of The Brazen Breakthrough close 2/23/24 @ midnight EST.

    Here's the LINK TO JOIN US.

    If you're catching this after the fact, then add your name to the waitlist with the link above.

  • Doors to this round of The Brazen Breakthrough close 2/23/24 @ midnight EST.

    Here's the LINK TO JOIN US.

    If you're catching this after the fact, then add your name to the waitlist with the link above.

  • Doors to this round of The Brazen Breakthrough close 2/23/24 @ midnight EST.

    Here's the LINK TO JOIN US.

    If you're catching this after the fact, then add your name to the waitlist with the link above.

  • Doors to this round of The Brazen Breakthrough close 2/23/24 @ midnight EST.

    Here's the LINK TO JOIN US.

    If you're catching this after the fact, then add your name to the waitlist with the link above.

  • Doors to this round of The Brazen Breakthrough close 2/23/24 @ midnight EST.

    Here's the LINK TO JOIN US.

    If you're catching this after the fact, then add your name to the waitlist with the link above.

  • What does it feel like to be in the right relationship? Join us on the Date Brazen Podcast as we get into this intriguing question with Maddie, a former client whose journey may inspire you. From discovering deeper essence-based preferences to finding her now-husband during the Brazen Breakthrough program, Maddie's story is a testament to the transformative power of belief in self and taking courageous action.

    This episode is a beacon of hope, reminding you that what you desire does exist. Through inspiring stories like Maddie's, we witness firsthand that with bold action, the love and fulfillment you seek are not only possible but inevitable.

    Hot-takes and episode topics:

    Just got out of a relationship - is it too soon to do this work?

    The most impactful lesson Maddie learned that translates beyond dating

    Maddie shares her sparkly experience meeting her now husband on a dating app

    Overcoming doubt about whether or not you are in the right relationship

    How does it feel to be in the right relationship, and what is the work after you find it?

    Centering yourself in what you want sets you on a different path; there is transformative power in believing in the possibility of what you truly desire

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    Show notes:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/being-in-the-right-relationship

  • This week, Lily serves up some real talk about why it might be time to bid farewell to dating advice from your coupled friends. You’ll hear why it's crucial to take the reins of your dating life and stop relying on well-meaning but misaligned advice from friends in relationships.

    In this episode, Lily encourages you to set boundaries with friends who may unintentionally trivialize or patronize your dating experiences. She emphasizes cultivating supportive communities of single friends who genuinely understand and uplift your dating struggles.

    The goal of this episode is to leave you feeling empowered to take control of your dating journey and assemble a crew of friends who've got your back.

    Hot-takes and topics:

    Your coupled friends don’t know your love story. Hot-take: They don’t know more than you because they are in a relationship and you’re not.

    If dating advice friends give makes you feel small, or your dating experience is entertainment for them, it is time to fire your coupled friends from giving you dating advice.

    Surround yourself with people who get your dating struggle and who are moving forward with you.

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    Danielle Bayard Jackson, Friend Forward Podcast

    Show notes:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/fire-coupled-friends-from-giving-dating-advice

  • Have you ever wondered what questions to ask when you first meet someone? This week, Lily unpacks why qualifying/disqualifying questions are the ultimate game-changer and can transform your dating experience from emotionally exhausting to intentional and amazing.

    In this episode, Lily shares the ONE question that will revolutionize how you vet potential partners, ensuring you never waste time on lackluster dates and conversations again. Drawing from the program, The Brazen Breakthrough, and her upcoming book, Thank You, More Please, A Feminist Guide to Breaking Dumb Dating Rules and Finding Love, you get the tools and mindset needed to navigate the dating landscape confidently.

    Grab your notepad because this episode isn't just about strategy - it's a journey into reclaiming control of your dating narrative and steering towards the relationships you truly desire.

    Episode Hot-takes and topics:

    “Give yourself permission to want what you want and start showing up for what you want in your life.”

    Qualifying/Disqualifying questions lead to higher-quality dates: you don’t need to cast a wide net. You need to be very specific about the type of person you seek.

    “Most people are going to be wrong for you. You are for the few, not the many.”

    Stop sending bespoke messages and extending unnecessary emotional labor

    Q/D questions that get deeper than surface-level convos allow you to vet people quickly

    Ask the right questions and tune into your body to see how the answer makes you feel. You want to feel intrigue or curiosity or excitement. If you don’t, bless and release. .

    Other Q/D questions we LOVE and Questions we DO NOT love when you're first texting

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    Free Guide to Your Essence-Based Preferences


    Show notes:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/qd-questions-strategy

  • Feeling hopeless or panicked about in-person dating? Then, this episode will motivate you to prioritize your desires and step into the path of opportunity to create a juicy in-person dating life. Today, we are getting into the ins and outs of the Brazen Breakthrough and how it changed the game for member Chloé.

    Chloé opens up about what has been happening in her dating life and how she has been showing up differently. You’ll also hear how she now embodies what it means for her to have permissive, joyful connectivity. We are so excited for you to hear this episode. It is a beautiful example of a human creating the life she desires.

    Episode hot takes and topics:

    Chloé on finding partnership: “It is not embarrassing or weak to say that my life would thrive even fuller with deep witnessing and intimacy.”

    The lesson that changed how Chloé’s outlook on dating and dating apps

    “My feelings about dating have shifted dramatically.”

    How the Brazen Breakthrough helped Chloé create a juicy in-person dating life

    Breaking patterns that take you out of the path of opportunity

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!

    Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    Episode Link:

    http://datebrazen.com/blog/juicy-in-person-dating

  • Prepare for an epic episode of the Date Brazen podcast, where former Brazen Breakthrough client Maya opens up about her rollercoaster journey through self-discovery and empowered love! Join Lily as she and Maya dive deep into intentional dating and the power of co-creating relationships.

    In this episode, you’ll get the scoop on essence-based preferences and how Maya turned her dating game around. She shares how she embraced her needs and learned to communicate like a boss, and how she and her partner keep the romance alive with intention-setting actions.

    If you're ready for a journey filled with real talk and self-love, this episode is your go-to. 💕

    Episode hot takes and topics:

    “It is about my internal state. If I am full and whole. I can give of myself to someone else. It has to be a conscious activity.”

    Mindset shifts that helped Maya believe finding love was possible

    Relationships are a co-creation: “You are co-creating the relationship. It grows, it breeds, and it shifts. That is what is so beautiful about relationships.”

    “What’s meant for you won’t pass you by - this is something I live by for everything in my life.”

    How Maya learned to tap into her intuitive self to guide the way

    Links:
    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!
    Creating a Confident and Joyful-as-fuck Dating Life That Makes the Right Relationship Inevitable

    21. How Maya Found Love
    Maya’s Substack “On Holiday”
    Maya on Instagram

    Episode link:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/the-right-relationship-is-inevitable

  • Lily is sharing her complete guide to finding love on a dating app. You’ll hear how dating apps can help expand your social circle, help you get to know your dating personality, your triggers, and how to take care of yourself.

    Lily drills down into her fiercest, most direct dating app advice so that you can find more success on a dating app while preserving your mental health and finding joy in the process.

    This episode is fire! Take notes and get ready to dive into breaking the dumb dating rules of the dating app advice you've heard before that doesn't work and get a clear path forward.

    Episode Hot-takes and topics:

    Dating apps are just one tool in your dating tool kit.

    Choose the ONE dating app that works for you

    Create a cozy swiping routine and know your swiping tipping point

    How and why to avoid unnecessary emotional labor

    Lily’s formula for your dating app profiles - what makes your profile magnetic to people is YOU!

    Links:

    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!
    Free Guide to Your Essence-Based Preferences
    Episode 89: How the hell to meet someone in-person
    Episode 132: Before you swipe, try this meditation

    Show notes:

    http://datebrazen.com/blog/complete-guide-to-finding-love-on-a-dating-app

  • Pre-Order Lily's book- "Thank You More Please" HERE

    This week, Lily peels back the curtain on the journey of writing her book, "Thank You More Please: A Feminist Guide to Breaking Dumb Dating Rules and Finding Love." Lily shares the vulnerable moments, the highs and lows, and the transformative process of birthing this creative endeavor. Get ready for an intimate conversation about the unconventional feminist approach that inspired the book, her challenges, and the ultimate joy of bringing this guide to life.

    In this episode, you’ll hear the behind-the-scenes details, Lily's writing routine, and the soundtrack that fueled her creative process. This episode is not just about the book; it explores Lily's growth, courage, and mission to help you create a joyful and love-filled dating life on your terms. Plus, learn about the exciting pre-order bonuses with "Thank You More Please." Tune in and be part of this journey to love and self-discovery!

  • Have you been wanting to start that next big project or creative hobby this year? Get ready to ignite your creative flame with this episode featuring the hosts of The Spark File podcast, Susan Blackwell and Laura Camien! Lily is thrilled to welcome Susan and Laura to the show, together they dive into a candid conversation about creativity and overcoming perfectionism.

    In this episode, Lily opens up about her creative journey, from battling self-doubt to manifesting her dream of writing a book. Discover how Susan and Laura’s New Year's Creativity Kickoff planted the seeds for Lily's inspiring ideas and fueled her audacious declaration to write a book and start a podcast.

    Tune in for moments of celebration, insightful reflections on the creative process, and a deep dive into the challenges of increased visibility. Grab your favorite beverage, cozy up, and join Lily with guests Susan and Laura for a chat that's equal parts inspiration and real talk.

    Links:
    Pre-order Lily’s upcoming book, Thank You, More Please!
    The Spark File 2024 New Year Creativity Kick Off
    The Spark File

    Show notes:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/sparking-your-creative-power

  • How was your year? How have you grown? In the last episode of 2023, Lily shares her epic year in review, sharing some of her favorite brags and lessons. As you listen, we invite you to do the same - reflect, practice self-compassion, and celebrate your most cherished brags.

    Lily also answers listener questions, revealing insights into how she stayed grounded, who supported her through the challenges, and the mental shifts that were game-changers on her book-writing journey.

    Join in celebrating the achievements, reflecting on the lessons learned, and looking forward to a new year filled with growth and empowerment.

    Links:
    Download the free Guide to Your Essence-Based Preferences

    Show notes:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/my-epic-year-in-review-2023

  • Have you ever found yourself in a dating rut, unsure how to break free and progress? The key to moving forward is within reach. If you're feeling paralyzed, questioning where to begin, or navigating the uncertainties of being single, the solution lies in identifying your essence-based preferences.

    In this episode, Lily shares the essence-based preferences tool that empowers you to attract the most fulfilling relationships. It is the tool that has allowed Lily and countless Date Brazen clients to attract the best relationship of their lives. Tune in and unlock the potential for positive change in your dating journey.

    Hot-takes and topics:

    When you learn to trust what you want, you will set more boundaries and know when you are in the presence of the right kind of people.

    One tool for building self-trust is creating your essence-based preferences!

    The two categories of essence-based preferences: logistical and personality traits/values

    Lily explores how to ask for what you want in your dating life out loud (hint: this is where your co-conspirators come in!)

    Links:

    Download the free Guide to Your Essence-Based Preferences
    VIP One-on-One Coaching with Lily
    135. How to create your essence-based preferences

    Show link:
    http://datebrazen.com/blog/create-essence-based-preferences-with-ease